


On The Road To Somewhere

by felisblanco



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Breathplay, Light Bondage, M/M, Rimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-06-01
Updated: 2007-06-09
Packaged: 2018-10-20 13:46:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 30,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10663875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felisblanco/pseuds/felisblanco
Summary: A promising young artist named Liam is on his way to New York to open his first big exhibition when he comes upon Spike, a runaway teen that's stranded with a busted motorbike by the side of the road.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for [](http://spring-spangel.livejournal.com/profile)[spring_spangel](http://spring-spangel.livejournal.com/). The idea for this came to me when reading The Music of Chance by Paul Auster, about a man on a roadtrip who picks up a young hitchhiker. (That's pretty much all these stories have in common) That was two years ago, and the first 7 pages of this have been sitting in my notebook until I finally typed them up last month. And then decided to finish it for [](http://spring-spangel.livejournal.com/profile)[spring_spangel](http://spring-spangel.livejournal.com/).

Liam never picked up hitchhikers. Never, ever. He'd heard enough stories of slit throats and traumatized rape victims to take stupid chances like that. Ever.

So why the hell did he find himself slowing down until he came to a stop only a few yards away from the stranded biker?

Maybe because he looked so harmless, like a lost little boy where he stood by his bike, helmet kicked to the side. Maybe because it was obviously not a setup, just an unlucky rider needing help. Maybe because he'd been driving for two days straight and the loneliness was killing him.

Or just maybe it was because, even with just the quick glance he threw the boy as he drove by, he was struck by his looks, the blond hair, his tanned bare arms and his big – and later he discovered, blue – eyes looking up at him with tired hopelessness.

The boy was still standing in the same place, staring after him. Shifting in reverse Liam backed the truck until it was lined up beside the biker. Still wondering what the hell he was doing he rolled down the window and leaned across the passenger seat, raising his eyebrows at the kid.

“Need help?”

Hope sparkled in the boy's eyes and he walked over, smiling. “Yeah. Busted my front tire on a broken bottle. Lucky I didn't smack into a bloody tree or something,” he said, voice sporting a lovely English accent. He glanced over at the bike then inclined his head toward the back of the truck. “Think you can give us a ride to the nearest garage?”

“Can't see why not.”

Liam jumped out and together they hoisted the bike up on the back of the truck. Liam threw the tarp over it since it looked like it might start to rain any moment.

“Thanks, mate. Just gotta get my...” The kid hesitated, shooting a worried glance at the helmet lying at the edge of the woods and then back at the truck, seeming to judge the distance.

Liam chuckled. “Relax. I'm not gonna drive away and leave you stranded.”

The kid gave him an apologetic smile but the suspicious look didn't leave his eyes and he dashed to retrieve the helmet, returning before Liam even had the time to open the car door. Liam couldn't help laughing. Here he was, worrying that the boy might slit his throat and at the same time the kid thought he might steal his bike. Nice world they lived in.

“What?” the kid said, eyeing him with a frown. “What’s so funny?”

Liam chuckled. “Nothing. Get in.”

The boy suddenly hesitated, maybe he'd just remembered some ugly hitchhiker stories of his own. Liam just gave him a friendly smile and slid in behind the wheel, again giving the kid a comforting smile when he climbed in and closed the door warily behind him. Liam pulled out and they drove in silence for a while, the boy nervously fingering the hem of his jacket that he'd lain over his lap.

“So, what's your name?”

The boy had obviously been deep in thought because he jerked into alert and looked up at him, that same wary look back in his eyes, hesitating for a moment before he said, “Spike. You can call me Spike.”

Okay. “Well, Spike, I'm Liam. Nice to meet you. You from England?”

The boy relaxed slightly. “Yeah. Been here a few years though.”

Liam grinned. “Just as well my mother’s not here. She used to tell me you're all arrogant bastards.”

At the blank look on Spike's face he added, “Irish. My mom that is. According to her all my ancestors starved to death because of your ancestors.” Still only getting slow blinks as a response, Liam sighed. “Never mind. She loved Paul McCartney so you can't all be bad.”

Spike snorted. “One thing I can thank The Beatles for then. That and inventing heavy metal.”

Liam frowned. “The Beatles didn't invent heavy metal.”

“Helter Skelter? The world's first heavy metal song?”

Now it was Spike's time to sigh as Liam only continued to frown at him in confusion. “Guess it's true what my mum said about you lot then. Thick as a Mick.”

Liam tried to look indignant but the grin on Spike's face was infectious and he gave up, laughing and shaking his head.

“So where are you headed?” He glanced over and saw the hesitation was back in Spike's eyes so he quickly added, “Not that it's any of my business.”

“No, it's all right. It's just... I'm not sure. Just wanted to get away, you know?”

Liam nodded. That was something he did very well know. “Yeah, been there, done that.” He glanced at the boy again. “Didn't help though.”

Spike started to pluck at the hem of his jacket again, avoiding Liam's curious eyes. “No?”

“Not really. I may have left the problem behind for a while, but it never left me. Stuck in my head no matter how far I drove. Eating at my soul like cancer,” he added, more to himself than at Spike, then cringed when he realised what he’d said. Always with the melodrama, he was, like a teenage emo girl.

“That bad?” Spike eyed him curiously then blushed and looked away. “Sorry, mate. None of my business.”

Liam shook his head. “Nah, it's alright. It's just... I don't usually talk about myself this much. Or at all really” He laughed softly. “Watch out or you'll have me lying in your lap, telling you my life story.”

Spike’s eyes widened slightly and Liam mentally kicked himself. “I think I'll shut up now.”

Spike shifted, biting his lip as he seemed to contemplate the situation. Finally he lifted his head and looked straight at Liam. “If you want to talk, it’s all right. Mum always said I was a good listener.”

He smiled but it was a sad and pained smile and it made Liam wonder what really had happened to leave the boy stranded in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the bike and the clothes he wore.

“Besides it'd be a relief focusing on someone else’s problems for a while. But if you don’t want to...” Spike shrugged. “Just thought I’d offer. Makes the time go by faster.”

It surprised Liam how tempted he was by the offer. It was true what he'd told Spike. He never talked about himself. Never talked really much at all. Growing up his silent nature had earned him the nickname Broodypants, which had changed gradually to Mr. Broody as he got older. It stuck to him well enough that by the time he got to college most of his fellow students had taken it for his real name since he never really bothered to correct them.

But being alone for so long was having its effect on him and suddenly the need to talk, to just put it all out there, whether to be judged or accepted... it was overwhelming. Liam pursed his lips and flexed his fingers slightly on the steering wheel. He’d been tightening his hold without noticing it and his knuckles creaked in relief as they were made to relax.

“Are you sure? I mean, any time you get bored just tell me to shut up. I promise I won't mind.”

Spike chuckled. “Mate, if I get bored I'm more likely to fall asleep. Comfy car you've got.”

Liam looked over at him. The boy did look tired. His face was pale under the tan, his eyes rimmed red, from exhaustion or crying he couldn't tell. This was getting more and more intriguing. Most of all he wanted to hear _Spike's_ life story but he had a feeling that would proof hard to get. Funny thing was, the kid reminded him of himself in some ways. Not his broody self, the kid didn't look the type, although his pouty lips had probably expressed their share of sulking. It was more that lost look in his eyes that spoke of hopelessness and sorrow, something he knew only too well himself.

The kid was watching him now, smiling reassuringly and he seemed to be genuinely interested. Liam hesitated, the prospect of finally talking about all the things that had happened to him almost frightening. But not nearly as frightening as it would have been talking to someone he knew. He guessed it was true what they say, that talking to strangers was easier because even if they judge you it doesn’t hurt as much as being judged by your friends or family.

He flexed his fingers again, watching them tighten and his knuckles whiten as they instantly resumed their tight grip on the wheel. Maybe he was making a mistake. Maybe he should just laugh it off, say he was only joking. Maybe he should…

“You said you wanted to get away,” he started, surprising himself. “Four years ago that was all I wanted to do. I felt stuck in a life I didn't want, a job I hated, a relationship that was suffocating me and a body that kept betraying me.”

He felt Spike's eyes resting on him but he stared straight ahead, at the road winding endlessly before them.

“After I got my degree in corporate law, graduating top of my class just like my father had wanted me to, I joined his firm. I quickly worked my way up, snatching more and more important cases. Not by connections, my father would never grant me special favours. In fact he did his best to keep me down, but his partners overruled him. So there I was, taking from the poor and giving more to the rich. Which is more or less what corporate lawyers do, at least at my father's firm.” He twisted his lips into a frown of distaste. “Anyway, wanting to strengthen the bonds with one of the potential partners a pact was made and I was ordered to date Mr. Summers’ daughter. Just like that. Modern prostitution in its finest form.” Again he felt Spike's eyes on him but he couldn't meet them.

“I should have said no. This is after all not the 19th century, people don't do these things anymore, or so I thought. But instead I asked her out and within a year we were engaged. She was a lovely girl. Beautiful, blond, vibrant and witty. Only problem was...” He paused then turned his gaze on Spike. “... she was a girl.”

He waited for the look of shock or the frown of disgust but neither came. Spike just nodded and waited for him to continue. Liam let lose a breath he hadn't realised he was holding, his shoulders and arms relaxing, and he allowed himself a small smile before continuing.

“So yes, I felt stuck. I hated my job even if I was good at it. I wanted to be a painter, you know. At school I was considered quite the prodigy, but my father wouldn't hear of it. That wasn't a career, he said, it was a hobby for queers. Mind you, at that time I of course hadn't told him I was one. But I knew, had always known ever since my classmates started talking about girls and boobs and trying to catch a sight of them naked and I realised I'd much rather the guys would take off their own clothes.” He chuckled. “Could be quite embarrassing, I tell you, showering with a bunch of high school jocks and trying to hide the effect they were having on me. Don't think anyone noticed but I was terrified they might find out. Comparing sizes was much more fun for me though, I guess.”

Spike snorted beside him and Liam looked over in surprise. The grin on the boy's face was not what he'd expected but it filled him with a sweet warmth that had him smiling back. Then his face sobered when he remembered the next part of the story.

“But I was a coward. I was 21 and I had yet to come out. Every now and then I went to gay bars, more to be able to be myself than to pick up guys. Even if that did happen on a few occasions it was never anything serious, just a way to relief tension and… well, have some decent sex.”

Spike snorted again and Liam wanted to hug him.

“After I started dating Buffy...” The choked laughter had him rolling his eyes. “Yeah, I know. How do people come up with these names?” He smirked and added, “Spike.”

Spike laughed, an open and happy laugh that made Liam's heart jump. Then the kid stuck out his tongue at him in such a childish way that for a second Liam wondered how old he really was. And what a lovely tongue he had but that thought he suppressed quickly, turning to stare at the road ahead instead. After a few moments he continued his story, hoping it would kill whatever was starting to stir within him.

“Anyway, Buffy. I kept faithful while dating her even if I knew being with her was wrong on so many levels. But I’m not a cheater. Or I thought I wasn’t. Until Lindsey came along.”

His knuckles whitened again on the wheel and he felt Spike shift beside him, as if he was preparing himself for whatever was to come.

“Lindsey MacDonald was this hot young lawyer from LA. Dad brought him over to help out with a criminal case that came up with one of our clients. I won’t go into details but it involved some young girls and some very sick old men.” His face turned grim as he remembered the report. “I wanted us to stay out of it, let some other firm dirty their hands with it, but of course my father wouldn’t listen. We just needed someone competent to handle it, he said. Someone who could keep this important client out of jail and his money with our firm. Didn’t matter that the man was clearly guilty, that he was responsible for destroying these girls’ lives in the most horrible way. All that mattered was his money.”

He paused, the disgust once again overwhelming him. He knew every man had a right to the best possible defence, no matter how guilty he was. But men like that brought out the worst in him, making him long for a shotgun and a shovel and a drive into the desert in the dark, bodybag in the trunk. Finally he shook it off, and gave Spike a tired smile before continuing. Nothing he could do about it anyway.

“So there I was, working late at the office, basically using any excuse not to be with Buffy, and in walks this Texan. Shoulder length hair, killer smile, accent smooth as silk. Wearing jeans and a plaid shirt, cowboy boots and a Stetson hat planted far back on his head. Just got in from the airport, he said, and did I know where he was supposed to be staying? I stared at him, blushing like a teenager and my heart started racing. The guy practically oozed sex, like he was a walking hard-on.”

Liam laughed, embarrassed. “You know that old gaydar myth? Well, I’ve never really had that so I had no idea if he was gay or straight but the way he talked and moved, the way he kept looking up at me through his long eyelashes, how his fingers lingered just a little too long as we shook hands... All those tiny things that probably meant nothing and still they made me weak in the knees and I knew I was falling. Hard.”

Liam glanced over at Spike, again looking for that awkward and uncomfortable squirm that would tell him he was going too far. But Spike sat relaxed, tilting his head a little as he observed Liam with interest. Relieved Liam turned his eyes back on the road.

“Anyway, I took him to his hotel and when he asked me if I knew of a good place to get a drink I jumped at the opportunity. We ended up at this quiet bar, soft blues playing through a cloud of smoke. We talked about music and from there we went on to art and I told him all about my dreams of becoming a painter. It felt incredible, like I’d finally found my soulmate. It got later and we got drunker and before I knew what was happening I was on my knees in the restroom.”

He stopped short, his face heating up. Despite the boy’s tolerance so far, that was probably way more than he wanted to hear.

“It’s alright. I really don’t mind.”

Spike’s voice startled him after only hearing his own for so long and Liam glanced over at him, surprised. The blue eyes looking back at him were open and honest, if a little mischievous, as if he knew Liam had gotten carried away with his own story and thus revealed things he probably never intended, and it amused him.

“You won’t shock me, mate. I know I’m young but I’m hardly a virgin.” Spike chuckled, as Liam blushed even further. “Don’t be shy. Hey, maybe I can even learn a thing or two,” he added with a wink.

Liam blinked as wild and highly inappropriate images flashed through his head. He wasn’t sure what to think. His gaydar really did suck and he had no idea if the kid meant it or if he was just trying to be supportive in his own odd and, possibly unaware, suggestive way. In the end he decided to shrug it off. He knew nothing about this kid, not even if he was of legal age, and any kind of approach could scare him off, and possibly land his own ass in jail. And he wasn’t looking for a hook-up, not now, not really. The kid was pretty though, that couldn’t be denied. Positively beautiful. And there was something about him that made Liam feel… But no. Better not go there.

“Still, to spare you the details, that night I became a cheater. And every single night after that for the next month.”

Liam bit his lip, the guilt still as strong. Buffy hadn’t deserved being treated like that. It wasn’t her fault, any of it. She just got caught in their parents’ ploy, unaware of its purpose, just happy and blindingly in love with a guy that felt nothing for her. He wondered if she had ever been told the truth. Somehow he doubted it.

Spike was watching him but when Liam glanced his way there was no contempt in his eyes, just curiosity, and Liam breathed out.

“Lindsey was like a drug, like crack or cocaine, and I was totally addicted. I just couldn’t get enough. During office hours we stole kisses and touches, every chance we got. Blowjobs in the staircase, once even fucked in the underground carpark.” Liam shivered, lost in the memory. “I burned for him, literally feeling fire in my veins just by looking at him. And he… He was like the Devil. Constantly tempting me, teasing me. Driving me completely insane with lust. He would sit at meetings, looking my father straight in the eye while his hand was in my lap under the table, stroking me.”

Spike shifted beside him but Liam kept his eyes on the road, his voice unsteady. “We were playing with fire and I didn’t care because he didn’t care and I would have done anything for him. Every elevator ride was like a trip to Heaven, every moment in other’s company like Hell. He’d smile and laugh with Buffy, then as soon as she turned her back he’d pinch me hard in the ass or squeeze my constant erection. I had to wear the tightest underwear, so everyone in the office wouldn’t see my hard-on. God, I had never been so happy and at the same time never felt so scared in my whole life. I never wanted it to end and at the same time I felt that one more second of this torture would kill me.”

He stopped and for a few minutes they drove in silence. It had started to rain and the wind was lashing against the rooftop, running in rivers down the windows. It seemed fitting, like God was providing him with a soundtrack to match his story. He wouldn’t be the least surprised if any minute now, lightning crossed the sky, rolling ominous thunder their way.

Just then it did and Spike jumped beside him, fingers grabbing for the door handle as he stared startled up at the sky. How Hollywood, Liam thought wryly and threw the kid a reassuring smile. Spike swallowed but smiled back, his fingers slowly unclenching and he let his hands rest in his lap, unconsciously turning a silver ring on his thumb.

“And then?” he finally asked and Liam recognised it for the plea it was. If the kid needed a distraction Liam would happily provide him with one. Even if what was coming up next still made him hurt more than he’d imagined possible.

“And then we got caught.” He gave a short laugh. “Of course we did. You can’t be that reckless and get away with it. Not for long anyway. It was one of the security guys at the firm. Handed my father a video tape and everything.”

He felt Spike flinch in sympathy but again he kept his eyes on the road.

“The old man was furious. Called me to his office and raged over me like a madman. Told me what a disgusting pervert I was, how much he despised me and that I was not worthy of his precious name. Told me I was to stop immediately or he would beat the crap out of me. Then he sat down, cold and business like, and told me that the only thing to do now was to hurry up with the wedding. And if I ever mentioned any of this to Buffy or her father he would disown me. I could forget any money I thought was coming my way if I didn’t do as he said.”

Liam shook his head. It still baffled him, that particular part of the whole thing. “I just stared at him. I knew he would be furious but I never expected him to say the wedding was still on. His arrogance struck that tiny cord of courage I had deep inside me and I told him there would be no wedding. I was gay, had always been gay and I’d finally found love.” He swallowed. “My father laughed at me and then he spat in my face.”

Again Spike flinched and Liam could feel his face pale in remembrance of the blatant hatred he’d never expected to see in his own father’s eyes. “I stared at him in shock as his spittle ran down my cheek. He told me to leave and never ever contact him again. I was still staring at him when the security guards came to throw me out. He ignored me, shuffling pages on his desk as they dragged me out of his office, yelling for him to please don’t do this, please hear me out. I was his son, his only son, didn’t that mean anything to him?”

His voice broke briefly and when he continued it was hoarse and shaky. “Once out in the street I panicked as what had happened finally sunk in and I called Lindsey, absolutely frantic. He didn’t answer. I kept trying to call him for the next two days but he never picked up. He had checked out of his hotel room and no one seemed to know where he was. I was going insane with worry, to the point that I was convinced that my father had done something horrible, maybe even had him killed.” He laughed bitterly. “And that’s when I saw the news in the local paper. My father had given Lindsey my job and what’s more, he was the new junior partner of the firm. There was a picture of the two of them shaking hands, smiling like best buds.”

Liam took a deep breath, trying his best to steady his voice. “I don’t know how or why. I don’t know if he blackmailed his way in somehow or if this was my father’s way of humiliating me even further. I didn’t really care, I just… I wanted to die. Instead I got drunk and cried myself to sleep. The next day I got in my car and drove away.”

They sat in silence for a long time, Liam lost in his memories, Spike staring out of the window.

Finally Liam coughed and cleared his throat. “So that’s my life story, more or less. I went back two years later when my father died. I couldn’t grief for him but I mourned the father I wished he’d been. Lindsey was at the funeral, a pregnant Buffy on his arm. Neither of them even looked at me. The will left me nothing but I already knew that. The next day I left again and I never looked back.”

He drummed his fingers on the wheel and glanced at the boy. He seemed deep in thought, biting his lower lip and running his fingers along the dashboard.

“So, did I bore you yet?”

“No.” Spike shifted in his seat, blinking with a furrow brow before looking up at him, anxious. “Then what? I mean, what the hell happened? What did you do?”

“Do?”

“Yeah. Like… Are you still a lawyer?”

Liam nodded. “By degree, yes. But I don’t practice anymore. In fact I paint.” He smiled at Spike’s shocked look. “Yep, I went from wealthy lawyer to dirt poor artist in no time. It was a struggle but I’m finally doing what I wanted and I love it. And in the end it paid off. I have an exhibition in New York next week. That’s where I’m headed, to set it up. Who’d had thought, huh?”

“I would,” said Spike quietly after a moment’s silence. “I think you look like the kind of man who could do anything he set his mind to.”

Liam blushed. “I wouldn’t say that. Haven’t had a single relationship in those four years.” He shrugged. “Sometimes I think he might have ruined me for life.”

“No! Don’t bloody well say that!”

Liam looked startled over at Spike’s flushed face.

“I mean, that’s not how a story should end. You meet obstacles, you overcome them. You have your heart broken only to find something better. There’s supposed to be a happy ever after.”

“You know life doesn’t work that way.”

“Well, it bloody well should!” Spike slammed his fist angrily down on the dashboard. “What the fuck is the point otherwise?”

Liam frowned. The kid was trembling, his lips twitching with suppressed emotions.

“Hey, calm down. Are you alright?”

Spike didn’t answer, just turned his head and stared out into the dark and rainy night. He looked impossibly young and again Liam wondered what had driven this kid out on the road, what he was running from. He had thought that maybe it was an abusive home but Spike’s reaction to his story had him wondering if maybe it was something else altogether.

He allowed the kid his space for a while, driving steadily along the highway. They would need to stop soon. He’d been driving for two days, only stopping for food and gas, and a short night’s sleep in a motel. It was starting to take its toll, he felt exhausted. Trouble was he didn’t know what to do about the kid. He was running low on cash himself but from the look of things the kid was even worse off. Question was how he would take Liam offering to pay for a room for him, especially considering the mood he was in now. He didn’t want the kid running off into the night in a huff, especially in this weather, but if they drove on much longer he was in danger of falling asleep at the wheel. After a moment’s hesitation he cleared his throat and glanced over at Spike who was still sitting eerily still, staring out into the dark.

“Listen, I don’t know about you but I’m beat. What do you say we find a motel?”

He could practically feel the air in the car sizzle with electricity. Looking over at Spike again he saw the kid had gone rigid, pulse beating frantically at his throat, and too late Liam realised what he’d said. Crap.

“I’ll spring for a single for you,” he added as if it was an afterthought, voice calm and casual. “If you’re short on cash, I mean. It’s okay. Least I can do for making you listen to my life story without yawning even once.”

Spike looked over at him warily, blinking as if he wasn’t sure he’d heard right. Then he visibly relaxed and even offered a small smile, seeming slightly embarrassed. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back, I promise. Somehow. I mean…”

“Don’t worry about it.” He gave Spike a quick smile and then turned back to the road, gazing through the dark in search of a motel sign. It came about fifteen minutes later and he turned off the highway, coming to a stop in front of the reception.

“You can wait in the car if you like. No use both of us getting wet,” he said and looked over at Spike.

The kid was fast asleep, face mashed up against the window. The green neon light of the vacancy sign cast an almost ghoulish colour over his skin, making his closed eyes look hollow and dark. Liam gazed at him for a long time, taking in what he’d only allowed himself to glance at until now.

There was no denying it, the boy was eerily pretty. Even pale and worn out he had features that bore the definition of beauty. High cheekbones, full lips and those startling blue eyes that were now hiding behind the thin eyelids. He could see them moving rapidly underneath, caught in a dream he hoped was pleasant but somehow he doubted it. The boy’s soft whimper seemed to confirm this and Liam reached out to shake him awake. Instead he found his fingers slipping across the boy’s neck, soothingly stroking him calm. His hair was slicked back, slightly flat from the helmet, but the natural curls had proven too strong at the neck where they swirled, soft like silk. Liam had a sudden vision of how the boy would look, just fucked and sleepy, hair mussed and tangled. He shivered and drew his hand back, closing his eyes for a brief moment before quietly getting out of the car.

He got them two singles. Even if Spike hadn’t shown such obvious discomfort at the prospect of sharing a room with him, Liam would have gotten him a separate room anyway. Truth was he didn’t trust himself around this boy. This boy, who for all he knew was a runaway teenager, under-aged and fragile as hell. Who knew what he’d been through to make him leave his home with no belongings except his bike? Liam wasn’t going to take advantage of that, no matter how tempted he was. He laughed quietly to himself, the absurdity of his thoughts suddenly hitting him. He didn’t even know if the kid was gay, for Christ’s sake! Way to jump the gun, Liam. Keep your thoughts to yourself and your dick in your pants.

He ran through the rain and jumped into the car, accidentally waking Spike up as he slammed the door shut a little too hard. The kid jumped up, blinking nervously as he looked around, taking in his surroundings.

“Our rooms are just over there,” Liam said and started the car, driving it over to the far end of the parking lot. He handed Spike one key and then grabbed his duffle bag from the back seat. “I think we better run.”

They dashed through the pouring rain, already drenched through when they reached the patio and ducked under the overhanging roof.

“Bloody hell!” Spike gasped and shook his head, drops flying everywhere.

“You can say that again,” Liam panted as he wiped the rain from his face.

“Bloody hell!” Spike repeated even louder, and then started laughing, looking down at his soaking clothes. “I look like a drowned rat!” He glanced up at Liam and laughed even harder. “And you’re even worse. I hope you’ve got some dry clothes in that bag of yours or you’re gonna be cranky as hell tomorrow.”

“Actually I do.” Liam gave him a thoughtful look. “You don’t though, right? Want to borrow something?”

“What, of yours?” Spike gave him an incredulous look. “No offence, mate, but you’re a bloody giant. I can’t really see anything fitting me.”

“I’m not a giant,” Liam said with a frown. “You’re the short one.”

“I’m not short!” Spike punched him lightly on the arm and huffed indignantly but his eyes were still smiling. “Just for that I’m not gonna share any of my gum with you.” He drew a soggy packet of Wrigley’s from his pants and shoved a plate into his mouth. “It’s good gum too,” he added with a smirk, his jaws working furiously.

With a growl in his stomach Liam realised they hadn’t eaten anything… well, him since noon and Spike since God knew when. There was a diner on the far side of the parking lot and he eyed it hungrily. Running over there meant getting even more wet but he figured it was better doing it now before they changed into dry clothes. Who knew if and when it would stop raining?

“What do you say we get something to eat? You hungry?”

The smile slipped from Spike’s face. “I don’t really have any…”

“My treat,” Liam quickly said.

Spike seemed to withdraw as he eyed Liam suspiciously. “Why?”

Liam frowned. “Why what?”

“Why are you being so nice?” Spike took a step back, glancing quickly around as if he was making sure he had an escape. “What’s in it for you?”

“Nothing! I’m just… What are you talking about?”

“This.” Spike swept his arm across the patio as if to indicate some invisible line-up of offences. “You paying for my room, buying me food. Offering me your bloody clothes.” He took another step back, his voice wary. “I don’t… I’m not for sale, if that’s what you thought. I know I look the part. Been told so many times. But I don’t do that. No. Not even for nice blokes like you.”

Liam blinked. “You thought… No! I’m not… I don’t expect… Jesus! No!” He ran one hand tiredly through his wet hair. “Listen, just because I’m gay doesn’t mean I jump every guy I meet, ok? And I never, never, expected you to pay me back. Especially not like that.”

Spike gazed at him for a moment then nodded. “Alright. Sorry.”

“I’d say it’s okay but seriously, what the hell?”

The kid blushed and ducked his head. “It’s just… Wouldn’t be the first time, you know? It happens that men…” He shrugged, his face looking suddenly pale in the moonlight. “I just wanted to make sure we were clear.”

“Crystal.”

He hadn’t meant to make his voice so icy but he was shaken and the way the boy flinched at his tone only upset him further. He knew it was partly because he felt guilty for his fleeting thoughts earlier, about how it would feel to taste this kid, to feel his skin under his fingers. It had been wrong and maybe the boy had picked up on some of it, maybe that was why he thought…

Liam took a deep breath and gave the boy an apologetic smile. “Listen, Spike. I don’t know… I mean…” He sighed and tried again. “I’m sorry if I gave you any reason to think that. It never even crossed my mind that you might....” He blushed and hoped it wasn’t too obvious in the pale moonlight. “I mean, you’re a good looking kid and I like you, but that’s it. I never meant to make you feel that you had to… You’re just a kid for Christ sake!”

Spike shook his head in irritation. “Stop saying that. I’m not a bloody kid! I’m nineteen, mate. How ancient are you?”

“I’m not ancient! I’m twenty five…” He paused, frowning. “Twenty six. I’m twenty six.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Which is it?”

“Twenty six.” Liam laughed softly to himself. “Guess the days caught up with me. I turned twenty six yesterday, I just forgot.”

Spike stared at him and then his face broke into the most glorious smile Liam could remember ever seeing. “Well, then. Guess we better celebrate!” He punched Liam lightly on the arm, his earlier mood seeming completely vanished and Liam felt slightly dazed at the change of atmosphere. “I’ll even let you buy me beer.”

“Yeah, right. You’re not twenty one, in fact you look closer to fifteen. I’m not gonna get arrested for providing alcohol to a minor.”

“So then you’ll just buy some and we take it back to the motel.” Spike grinned and quirked his eyebrow at him. “It’s your birthday, mate. Don’t be a party pooper.”

Liam glared at him but he could feel his resolve wavering. Hadn’t he been drinking himself by the age of seventeen? He never had any trouble with his mates in college drinking, or even high school, as long as they didn’t throw up on him or set his books on fire. A couple of beers wouldn’t hurt. And Spike was right, they should celebrate. He hadn’t had anyone to celebrate his birthday with for years. It would be nice.

“Ok, how about I go see if they can fix us something to take with us so we don’t have to sit there in our wet clothes? You go have a shower and change…” He opened his bag and ruffled through it, finally coming up with a pair of sweats and a more or less clean t-shirt. “Here. I’ll knock on your door when I’m ready.”

“Excellent. Oh, you’re not a health freak, right? Burger and chips, that’s the thing, yeah?”

He’d been hoping for something a little lighter but what the hell. “What do you take me for? Burger and… chips coming right up.”

Spike grinned and tugged the clothes under his arm. As he was about to unlock his door he glanced over his shoulder and said, “That’s French fries, you know? Not crisps. Although I wouldn’t mind some of those either.”

Liam blinked. Huh. “Of course.” What the hell were crisps?

Spike gave him another smile as he disappeared through the door and Liam smiled back before opening his own door, shoving the duffel bag inside. Bracing himself against the weather he squared his shoulders and then ran as fast as he could across the parking lot.

By the time he was back and had changed his clothes and towel dried his hair, the food was getting cold and he hurried over to the next room, knocking on the door. There was no answer but the door was unlocked so he let himself in. He could hear the water running in the bathroom and for a moment he contemplated turning around and waiting in his own room until he was sure Spike was done. Just then the water was turned off and the rustle of the shower curtain being pushed aside had him pinned to the spot.

“Erm… it’s just me,” he called out after knocking again on the door. “I can come back if you want?”

“Nah, I’ll be out in a minute.”

Liam nodded then realised Spike couldn’t see him and called an “Ok!” before placing the food on the small table and looking around. Spike’s wet clothes were laid out on the small chair, the dry clothes Liam had lent him lying on the bed. Which meant…

“Sorry. Been a while since I’ve had a good shower. Forgot the time.”

Liam looked up, his eyes glazing slightly over as he took in the sight before him.

The kid might be young but there was nothing juvenile about the body standing in front of him, clad in nothing but a thin white towel. The chest was pale in comparison to his tanned arms, youth-soft skin stretched over taunt muscles. Whatever suspicions he had had about Spike’s home situation there seemed to be no evidence of abuse, in fact he couldn’t recall ever seeing more perfect skin. There were still drops of water clinging to Spike’s hair, which was all wildly curled now, and as Liam watched a couple of drops fell to Spike’s shoulders, sliding down his chest and disappearing under his towel. Liam slowly raised his eyes again just in time to catch the wary look in Spike’s eyes as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared back in defiance.

“What?”

Liam blushed and quickly looked away. “Nothing.”

“Right.” Spike snatched up his clothes and disappeared back into the bathroom, shutting the door hard behind him.

Crap.

Liam busied himself laying out the food while he waited for Spike to return from the bathroom. He was just popping the caps of two of the bottles of beer when the door opened cautiously again and Spike stepped out. The sweats hang low on his hips, too long trouser legs pooling over his feet. The t-shirt was blue and brought out the colour of his eyes more clearly, efficiently taking the focus away from how big it was on him. His hair was once again slicked back and Liam fought the urge to walk over and ruffle it with his fingers. Because _that_ would surely make Spike relax and not bolt out of here like a scared rabbit, he thought wryly. He better get himself under control. Wouldn’t do to scare the kid even further.

“Hey. Not too bad.” At Spike’s wary look he indicated the clothes and gave what he hoped looked like a relaxed grin. “Told you I wasn’t a giant.”

Spike glanced down at his attire and then looked up, chuckling. “Yeah, right. I look like a little kid, mate. Which I’m _not_ ,” he emphasized, eyeing the beer. “That one for me?”

“Help yourself.” Liam purposefully kept his eyes on the food and away from Spike as he lifted the bottle to his lips and gulped down half of its content. “Food’s getting cold. Dig in.”

Spike pushed the wet clothes off the chair and sat down opposite Liam by the table, picking up his burger and biting into it with a moan. “’S good,” he mumbled with bits of bread and meat between his teeth, and took another gulp from the bottle. “’M starving.”

Liam was on the verge of telling him not to talk with his mouth full and slow down with the drinking but Spike was right. He wasn’t a kid and more importantly, Liam wasn’t his parent.

“Good.” He picked up the plastic utensils and was just about to start working on his own burger when he caught Spike rolling his eyes. “What?”

“Nothing.” Spike smirked and popped a couple of fries into his mouth, then licked his fingers.

Liam frowned, first at him and then down at the knife and fork in his hands. He put them aside and grabbed the burger, taking a big bite. Lettuce and a slice of tomato fell down into the container and he felt something wet splatter on his t-shirt. Ketchup. Oh, that’s just…He growled and grabbed a bunch of napkins, ignoring the muffled giggling coming from the other side of the table. When he looked up Spike was chewing enthusiastically, blinking at him with an innocent look in his eyes that wouldn’t have fooled anyone.

“Need some help?”

“Shut up.”

Spike laughed and then he took a paper napkin and reached across the table, wiping at the corner of Liam’s mouth. “Such elegance. Did any of that go where it was supposed to?”

Liam was caught between swiping at his hand and leaning into the touch. “You’re one to talk.” He tapped his chin and nodded toward Spike. “Got a little something there.”

Spike frowned and licked around his mouth, stretching his tongue obscenely far in order to reach the right spot. “Gone?”

“Uhuh,” Liam managed with a nod and grabbed his beer, gulping half of it down. What the hell was wrong with him? They were just eating, for God’s sake. This was not _9 ½_ weeks and Spike was definitely not Kim Basinger.

The rest of the meal went by in silence and by the time Liam wiped the last trace of ketchup and salt from his lips they were both finishing their second beer. He felt full and relaxed and would have been satisfied to head back to his room and climb into bed for a good night’s sleep. But the moment he sat back in his chair and was about to thank Spike for a nice day, Spike jumped up and finished his beer before grabbing another.

“Let’s see what’s on telly, eh?” He walked over to the bed and grabbed the remote before throwing himself down, turning on the television.

“Er… sure.”

Liam got up slowly and walked over. Spike scooted over to give him room but they would still have to sit practically glued together, and Liam shifted his eyes to the chair by the table and then back again. “Maybe I should..”

“Don’t be daft. Oh look, _Snatch_. Yeah. Love that bloke.”

Liam balanced awkwardly on the edge of the bed, trying to keep some distance between them. He peered at the screen. “Who? Brad Pitt? Well, I guess he’s…”

“Vinnie Jones, mate! Don’t you know Vinnie Jones?” Spike elbowed him playfully and Liam managed a brief flail before promptly sliding off the bed and falling less than gracefully on his ass. Ow!

“Whoa, you alright?”

Spike peered at him over the edge of the bed, seeming more startled than amused, his face tense until Liam groaned and shot him a scowl. “You threw me off the bed!” he huffed and got slowly to his feet, rubbing his backside.

“No, I didn’t.” Spike grinned and scooted back to his side, leaving even more space for Liam this time. “Your own bloody fault for sitting on the edge like that.”

“Maybe I should just get the chair…”

“You know, I’m not contagious.” The boy looked actually hurt for a moment before covering it up with a smirk. “Of course you’ve got a big bum so I guess you need your space.”

“I do _not_ have a big…!” Liam gritted his teeth. “Fine.” He sat down again, close enough to the middle that Spike was now the one in danger of falling off, and crossed his arms on his chest. “What’s this we’re watching again?”

“ _Snatch_. Not as good as _Lock, Stock_ but it’s alright.” Spike scooted closer and took another sip off his beer before pointing it at the TV. “And that one’s Vinnie Jones. Great football player.”

“Huh. What is he? Quarterback?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Not American football, you twit. _Real_ football, which you actually play with your f _eet_.”

Liam blinked and then he got it. “Ah. Soccer.”

That earned him another roll of eyes and an indignant huff. “ _Football!_ ”

“Soccer.” Liam smirked when Spike shot him a glare.

“Shut up and watch the bloody thing, will you?” He shifted and then muttered under his breath, “Football. It’s bloody football, you stupid Americans fucking up our language.”

“I can hear you, you know.”

“Hmph.”

They watched in silence for a while, Spike sipping his beer with an air of irritation and Liam trying his hardest not to laugh as he gulped his own down. Finally he stretched out to retrieve the bag of chips from the floor, opened it and offered to Spike. “Want some ‘crisps’?”

Spike glared at him but then his face softened and he smiled. “Yeah, alright. Thanks.” He grabbed a handful from the bag and proceeded to stuff them into his mouth. Then laughed at something on the screen, spreading bits of chips all over himself without even noticing.

Liam grinned and ate a couple himself, having more fun watching Spike than paying any real attention to the movie. He was starting to feel pleasantly buzzed, like something furry was sitting on his forehead, numbing his nose. He put the empty bottle on the floor and rubbed at his face absently, sighing in content. Spike threw him a smile and emptied his bottle as well before sliding lower on the bed, one hand propped under his head.

“This is life, yeah?”

“Mmmm…” Liam agreed with a nod. “’S not bad.”

Spike was warm and so damn tantalising by his side that Liam closed his eyes, forcing himself to breathe slowly. It worked, to the point that he could feel himself drifting off, his body going slack and he shifted further down on the bed, trying to get more comfortable.

“Thanks. You know, for everything.”

He could feel Spike turning his head, breathing into his neck and grunted something that could be construed as ‘You’re welcome’.

“And for not asking,” Spike continued, the sound of him swallowing making Liam’s stomach tighten. “I mean, I know you must have been wondering what I was doing there, all by myself, with no money or anything.”

Liam opened one eye. “None of my business.”

He turned his head and stared straight into Spike’s blue eyes that were watching him warily. Oh wow, he had really pretty eyes.

“Uh, unless you want to talk?” Liam offered hesitantly. Truth was he really did want to know, and he’d only been able to keep his curiosity to himself because he was afraid of scaring the kid off.

Spike blinked slowly, his pupils widening, making his eyes darken and Liam could feel his heart speeding up, the urge to lick his lips overwhelming. Were they going to…?

Spike flopped back down on his back and stared up at the ceiling. He sucked his lower lip in between his teeth and then let it go with a snap, puckering his lips thoughtfully. Liam swallowed and forced himself to close his eyes again. So no kissing this time. Damn. Despite the hard-on growing in his pants he started to drift off again as the silence stretched out, so when Spike finally spoke he jumped slightly in surprise.

“It’s not what you probably think. My dad doesn’t smack me around, my mum’s not a drunk. Nothing like that. In fact, they’re not even here.”

Spike shifted, pulling one knee up then laying his leg flat down again on the bed before crossing his feet at the ankles, fidgeting as if he wasn’t sure how to be. “My mum died some years ago,” he said. “Breast cancer. My dad… He didn’t handle it very well. Didn’t know how to handle me either. I wasn’t the easiest to be around. Not after…” He sighed. “Guess I was a bloody nuisance. Got into fights, even arrested a couple of times. Did… did drugs.”

Liam stayed silent, eyes still closed since every time he tried to open them the room started spinning. In the background the TV was blaring. It had changed into a rerun of some old sitcom and the tincan laughter made him cringe.

“Just weed at first and some e but then someone offered me a snort of cocaine and…” Spike shifted again and Liam was surprised when a sweaty hand slipped into his, fumbling in a way that almost made it seem like Spike was unaware of what he was doing. “I woke up in the hospital. Seems they found me just in the nick of time. My dad was sitting by my bed, crying.” The fingers tightened around Liam’s and he instinctively squeezed them back. “He said he couldn’t do this anymore. That either I got myself sorted out or…” There was a low hitch in the boy’s breath and Liam squeezed his fingers again, urging him on. “Then he left. I haven’t seen him since. That was three years ago.”

When he was sixteen.

“What did you do?” Liam asked quietly, wishing he wasn’t so damn drunk. Oddly enough Spike sounded completely sober.

“Got myself clean but I was too angry at him to go back home. Stayed at my granny’s house. She had an extra room and we got along alright. Then she died and left me some money and I came over here, bought the bike and just…” Spike shrugged. “Rode from state to state. Never stopping long enough to think where I was headed.”

Liam nodded. He could understand that. He glanced over at Spike, squinting his eyes to focus on the now carefully closed off face. He could tell there were other stories hiding there, just waiting to be told. Two years alone on the road, a kid that young… From what Spike had hinted at it hadn’t all been a bed of roses. Liam felt an overwhelming need to pull the kid into a hug, something he tried to blame on being too drunk. It had nothing to do with Spike smelling so damn good. Liam inhaled deeply and closed his eyes. Christ, he better pull himself together before he lost his mind completely and started molesting the boy in his vulnerable state. He turned his head again, staring up at the ceiling.

“And today?” His voice was hoarse and he awkwardly cleared his throat before continuing. “I mean, no way you’ve been travelling with no luggage and no money all this time.”

Spike shifted, pulling his hand away to rub it over his face and when Liam glanced over he saw the boy was blushing.

“Yeah, that.” He laughed, a soft embarrassed sound. “Would you believe I got robbed? Not even in the heroic bumped-over-the-head or at-gunpoint way. Just went to bed with someone who seemed decent enough and next thing I know I’m waking up alone with nothing but the clothes I wore left lying on a chair. Only reason he didn’t take my bike was I had it chained to an iron fence, and he had his own anyway.”

Liam blinked. _He?_ Did that mean…? Huh. Out loud he said, “Bummer,” and shook his head in sympathy. “That blows.”

“Bummer?” Spike rose up on one elbow and grinned down at him. “Are… are you drunk?”

“No!” Liam huffed indignantly and tried to push Spike away, somehow ending up with one hand palming his cheek instead. “I’m not…” He frowned. “Maybe a little.”

Spike laughed but he didn’t pull away. His face was slightly flushed, the skin warm under Liam’s palm, and his eyes flashed in sync with the TV. “I’d say more than a little.”

“How come you’re not?” Liam asked with a pout.

“More stamina. That’s what being a junkie does to you.” Spike was still smiling but it didn’t reach his eyes anymore.

Liam sighed and slid his thumb over Spike’s cheekbone, gazing at him softly. “You were a kid, Spike. So you flipped when your mom died. So what? Doesn’t make you a bad person. Cut yourself some slack.”

Spike’s smile fell and he swallowed, licking his lips uncertainly. “You really think so? Because dad said…”

Liam shook his head. “Your dad was grieving for your mother while trying to take care of you. It became too much and he screwed up. He’s only human. Cut _him_ some slack.”

“But…” Spike paused, looking unsure as if that hadn’t even occurred to him and Liam was once again reminded of how damn young he was.

“You haven’t spoken in three years? Maybe it’s time you did.” Liam ran his fingers down Spike’s neck. He could feel the rapid heartbeat under the warm skin and wondered what it would feel like against his lips. “I’m sure he’s worried.”

“I don’t know if he would even want to talk to me,” Spike said sullenly.

“Don’t be stupid. He cried, man. You don’t cry over someone unless you love them.” Liam let his hand fall away. “Are you telling me that in those three years he never tried to contact you?”

“Well… no. While I was living with my granny he called a few times but I wasn’t… I refused to talk to him.” Spike blushed. “I guess I was still too angry.”

“And let me guess. Then you left the country without even telling him?” Liam sighed and sat up, gazing down at the kid who looked aptly chagrined. “Spike, I know it’s none of my business but… Call your dad! I bet he’s frantic with worry.”

“I can’t! I can’t just call him now. It would be like I was only calling because I ran out of money or something.”

Liam rolled his eyes. “You really think he’s gonna care about that? Let me say it again: He cried! For you! Now I don’t know if he’s the kind of man who weeps buckets at the drop of a hat but it would have taken more than that to make my old man break down. Like, losing his company or something. Losing his son certainly didn’t wring out a single tear.”

He cringed at the bitterness in his own voice and got slowly up off the bed. The room had stopped spinning but he felt dead tired.

“I’m going to bed. We’ll talk it over tomorrow. If you don’t want to ask him for money then don’t ask him. We’ll figure something out about the money.” He waved his hand dismissively. “The money is not important. Ok?”

“Figure out? Like how?” Spike sat up. “The little I had left on my account has probably been drawn already,” he said bitterly. “I’ve got no job, nothing worth selling except my bike and…”

“I can get you a job. If you come with me to New York. Ok?”

“But…”

“Tomorrow.” Liam rubbed his face tiredly. “Can we talk about this tomorrow? I’m beat.”

Spike opened his mouth but closed it again and nodded. “Ok.” He caught Liam’s wrist as he turned to walk away. “Hey. Thanks.”

Liam looked down at the fingers circling his wrist, wondering if Spike could feel his heartbeat speeding up, then raised his head. The boy was gazing at him, eyes steady even if his smile was hesitant and almost shy.

“You’re welcome.”

Spike stood slowly up, still not letting go of Liam’s wrist, his body radiating heat as it straightened up along his. “You really want me to come with you to New York?”

“Yeah. I mean, if you want to.” Liam swallowed and tried without success to pry his eyes away from Spike’s heated gaze. “I could use the company while driving and…I have a small apartment waiting for me there. I’m staying for the summer.”

Spike watched him speculatively. “You offering me a place to stay?”

“I guess.” Liam frowned. “But if you start with the whole I’m-not-for-sale crap again I’m taking it back. I’m not offering to be your sugar daddy or anything,” he said with a snort. “You’re not that pretty.”

Spike quickly let go of his wrist and stepped back, blushing. “I wasn’t going to! I just…” He looked away. “Sorry.”

“I’m kidding. Relax.” Liam shook his head and smiled. “And you’re plenty pretty, by the way,” he added with a wink.

Spike blinked, then a smirk tugged at his lips and he quirked one eyebrow. “Are you flirting with me?”

“I don’t know.” Liam grinned back. “Would you like me too?” he asked teasingly.

“Maybe.” It was quiet, almost mischievous in its shyness.

Liam’s heart jumped in his chest. “Then maybe I am.”

They held each other’s gaze for a while and then Liam looked away. “Tomorrow.” _When we’re not stupidly drunk._

Spike nodded after a moment’s hesitation. “Ok.”

Liam walked to the door, pausing with his hand on the knob. “I’m not misunderstanding anything, am I? You _are_ gay?”

Spike laughed. “More or less. Enough to want to snog the hell out of you.”

Liam could feel his face grow warm as he fought the urge to grin stupidly. “That’s gay enough for me,” he said instead and walked out, closing the door behind him. He had a feeling he was going to have some very interesting dreams tonight.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Warnings:** Breathplay, biting, mild bondage  
> 

When Liam knocked on Spike’s door the next morning he was half-expecting him to have split. Especially when, at first, there was no answer. He had his fist raised to knock for the third time when the door finally opened, revealing a bare-chested, sleepy Spike, his hair sticking out in all directions, trace of drool drying on his chin and bleary eyes glaring at Liam.

“Bloody hell, mate, what’s with the knocking? Do you know what time it is?”

Liam frowned. “It’s eight o’clock. You’re not up yet?”

“Eight **AM**? Oh, for fuck’s sake!”

The door was slammed in Liam’s face and he stood staring at it in disbelief. After a moment it opened again, reluctantly. Spike leaned on one arm against the doorframe, looking at him with tired resign. “You’re actually serious? You want to get going already?”

“Of course. We have to be in LA before nightfall.”

Spike groaned and rested his head on his arm. “Christ. How can you be so sodding chipper? You were drunker than me last night.”

“No, I wasn’t,” Liam answered indignantly. Ok, so maybe he had been but he never really got hung over unless he was drinking the strong stuff. “C’mon, I’ll buy you breakfast.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Spike muttered and walked back inside, leaving the door open for Liam follow. “Not like I have much to pack anyway.”

He was only wearing the sweats Liam had lent him and they seemed to have been put on in a hurry, the drawstring loose, making them slip even further down his hips. In the bright light of day the contrast between his pale chest and tanned arms was even more visible and when he turned around the sun caught in the hairs leading down from his navel, making them glow golden.

Liam swallowed and looked away.

Spike grabbed his jeans from the chair, grimacing at their cold dampness before looking down at what he was wearing. “Guess, I need to hold on to these a little longer. You sure you can let yourself be seen with me like this? I look like a bloody idiot.”

“You look amazing,” slipped away from Liam before he could stop himself. Spike’s eyes jumped up to stare at him and for a second Liam thought the kid was going to bolt. But then a slow smile spread over Spike’s face and he straightened up, tilting his head coquettishly.

“I thought maybe you’d changed your mind about all that.”

“About being gay?” Liam grinned. “No, that’s actually a lifetime thing.”

Spike snorted. “Not that, you wanker. Me. I thought you’d changed your mind about me.”

“Depends. You still feeling gay enough?”

Spike made as if he was thinking about it then nodded solemnly. “Yep. Pretty and witty and gay. That’s me.”

Liam threw him his t-shirt. “I don’t know about the witty part,” he said with a smirk.

“Yes, because _you_ are just a _riot_.” Spike laughed and pulled the t-shirt over his head. “Mr. Broody, the comedian.”

“Hey, I’m funny. I’m a funny man.”

“Oh yes, you’re hilarious.” Spike rolled his eyes then ducked as Liam made to swat at his head. “Hey, watch the hair, wanker!” he growled and tried to slick it back.

Liam reached over and ruffled Spike’s hair until it stuck up in sweaty curls again. “I like you with bed hair. It’s sexy.”

“Yeah?” Spike grinned. “Maybe I’ll keep it that way then.”

Liam laughed. “Get dressed. I’ll wait by the car.” He turned away, reaching out for the door.

“Liam?”

“Yeah?”

He glanced back and Spike grabbed him by the neck, pressing their lips together. It was quick and hard, just closed lips with no tongue, and Liam was just beginning to register what was happening when Spike pulled away, flushed and grinning.

“Yeah, definitely gay enough.”

Liam stared at him, his lips tingling and his cock rock-hard in his pants. Christ!

“Uh… Ok, then.”

He blinked and turned around, walking slowly to the car with Spike’s happy chuckle following him all the way.

\---------------

They ate breakfast at the diner. Toast and scrambled eggs with bacon, and then shared a stack of pancakes for dessert while sipping their coffee. Apparently Spike became just as ravenous as Liam did after a night of drinking which led Liam to wondering how he would be after a night spent having sex. Spike looked up at him just then and smiled, traces of maple syrup on his chin, and Liam decided that would be the next thing on his list to find out. They fought over the last piece, finally splitting it in half, and Liam watched Spike with an odd sense of belonging as he chewed away happily. He could get used to this. This was… nice.

As he finished his coffee, feeling about ready to burst, Liam told himself that it was important to start the day on a satisfying breakfast. He steadfastly ignored the little voice telling him that he hadn’t done any kind of exercise since he left LA. Sitting on his ass, driving, didn’t really burn off calories and he’d been eating way more and unhealthier than usual. He really needed to start thinking about his body again, especially if chances were he would be sharing it with someone small and blond and built like a jungle cat.

“We need road snacks,” Spike suddenly proclaimed in the middle of Liam’s musings and jumped up from the booth to go investigate the display of unhealthy fattening snacks and sweets by the counter.

Liam bit back a groan and joined him, eyeing the granola bars and bottles of soda water further back. Why was he being such an idiot about this? It was his body, hell it was his money paying for it. He should just pick what it was he really wanted and if Spike wanted to laugh, let him la-

“Ooh, pork rinds! Can we get those? And Pringles. I love Pringles.” Spike was practically beaming and the sulky girl behind the counter perked up and smiled back, batting her eyelashes.

“Maybe we should…” Liam started but abruptly shut up when Spike tilted his head and gave the girl a definite fuck-me smile as he leaned forward.

“What you reckon, luv? Best food to keep two blokes up and at it all day?” He raised his eyebrow and the girl blushed beet-red. “Chocolate, right? A girl’s best friend. Well, that and…” He pursed his lips suggestively.

She tittered nervously, eyes almost glazed over, and Liam shot her a glare. What the hell was going on here? Ok, so it’s not as if they were dating or anything but… Wasn’t Spike supposed to be gay anyway? Didn’t look that gay right now, practically drooling all over her. She wasn’t even that pretty, not that he’d know what the hell guys like Spike went for. The fact that he was going after someone with tits was strange enough. And what a pair of tits they were. Practically falling out of her too tight tank top. It really wasn’t sanitary in this sort of establishment. Maybe he should have a talk with the manager…

“What you want, Liam? Got a sweet tooth or is yours more of a salty pleasure?”

He snapped out of his broodings to find Spike watching him with a leer that shot straight to his groin and he found himself blushing. “What?”

“For snacks.” Spike’s grin changed into a frown and he reached out for him. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine!” Liam said curtly and snatched his arm away. “A Snickers and Doritos, thanks. And two Coke’s, thank you.”

Fuck the diet!

The girl’s smile fell and she rang up their purchases with a scowl. Spike stood quietly back, offering her a small apologetic smile as they said their goodbyes. They walked out to the car in silence and got in. Liam felt angry and stupid, and stupid about feeling angry. What the hell was wrong with him?

“Hey, is something the matter?” Spike finally said, when they had driven in silence for almost ten minutes. “Did… Did I do something?”

Liam shot him a glare but was startled to see that Spike seemed truly worried, almost as if he thought Liam was going to throw him out of the car for having angered him. Crap.

“No. No, you didn’t. I’m just…” Liam sighed. “Look, I got jealous, ok? And I know it’s stupid because it’s not like we’re dating or anything but I just thought…”

“You got jealous?” Spike stared at him in what seemed like genuine surprise. “How? Why? You mean that girl?”

“Yes, that girl!” Liam snapped. “You were flirting with her and she was drooling all over you. I just didn’t like it, ok?” He huffed in frustration and stared out at the road ahead of them. “One minute you’re telling me you’re gay and kissing me and the next…”

“Ok, first? I wasn’t flirting. Not really. I was just…” Spike paused as if in thought.

“Hitting on her?” Liam bit back.

“No! Look, I just wanted to make her smile because she looked bloody miserable. How would you feel being stuck in a shitty little town, barely out of high school and already with a bun in the oven? Not much of a life she’s got, I bet. So I tried to make her smile, that’s all.”

Liam blinked. “She wasn’t pregnant.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Like at least five months. Did your eyes never drop below her cleavage, you pervert?”

“Hey, gay man here! I don’t look at girls that way. Talking of which…” He glared accusingly at Spike.

Spike seemed to hesitate for a minute but then he took a deep breath and said, “I’m bi, alright. I appreciate both. You’ve got a problem with that?”

Liam stared at him, turning his eyes back just in time to save the car from flying off the road. “You told me you were gay,” he said warily.

“I said ‘more or less.’” Spike sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “Look, some gay men don’t like bisexuals for some reason. Think they’re just playing around or something. I’m cautious, ok? Don’t really see the need to hand everyone I meet a five-page long essay on my sexuality.” He offered a small smile. “Although it would make for quite an interesting read.”

Liam nodded, his unease dimming. “Ok. I guess that’s fair. You could have told me though. I mean, if we’re gonna be living together I’d like a warning before walking in on a half-naked girl in the bathroom or something.”

Spike stared at him and after a moment’s hesitation he said quietly, “I kinda figured if I was living with you there would be no other naked people.” He laughed nervously. “Unless I got that wrong.”

“Oh.” Liam blinked. “I mean, no. I mean…” He licked his lips. “I don’t want you to think…” God, why was this so difficult? “You can have both, if you want. The offer still stands even if we don’t… even if we just stay friends and nothing more.”

“Is that what you want? To just stay friends?” Spike cocked his head. “I thought you wanted to fuck me.”

Jesus Christ! The car swerved to the side and Liam brought it abruptly to a halt. He felt lightheaded, seemed like all the blood in his body had travelled south in a split of a second and his cock was throbbing painfully in his pants. When he looked over at Spike, the boy was watching him, but not with the smirk he had expected. Instead he seemed almost wary, as if he was afraid of being turned down.

“You know, you really shouldn’t say things like that when someone is driving,” Liam managed with a shaky smile.

“Sorry.” Spike looked aptly embarrassed, his eyes dropping to his lap where his hands lay clutched together, the thumb on his right hand nervously rubbing the knuckles on his left.

Liam swallowed and ran his fingers through his hair as he tried to find the right words. “Look, I know we just met but I like you. You seem like a nice guy and I definitely want to get to know you better. But I don’t want you thinking that that is a requirement for you being allowed to live at my place. Or ride in my car or, you know, eat my food.”

“Or wear your clothes” Spike added sarcastically and tugged at the sweatpants. He bit his lip then glanced up with a resigned look in his eyes. “I already told you, I don’t do that. Sell myself. I don’t know why people keep assuming…” He took a deep breath before continuing, “I don’t blame you for thinking I’m a slut after telling you about jumping into bed with that guy. But I never do anything like that. I was lonely and I got drunk and…” He blushed. “Ok, and then I got drunk in bed with you but…”

Liam waved that off. “Stop apologising. If that makes you a slut then consider me one too. Hell, I had sex with a girl for months because I hadn’t the balls to tell her I was gay. And I wasn’t even drunk. Well, sometimes,” he admitted then frowned in thought. “Most times actually. It’s not easy turning a girl into a guy in your head while having sex. Though it does help if she’s got small breasts,” he added.

Spike laughed softly but then he turned serious again. “My point is, I don’t usually do stuff like this unless I mean it. Unless I think there’s a chance it will become something more than just casual sex. But if you’re not thinking along those lines I think I’d rather know now before I put myself out there, you know?” He locked his eyes with Liam’s in open sincerity and Liam could feel his heart jumping.

“Yeah.” He swallowed. “Ok.”

“Ok?” Spike smiled and quirked one eyebrow at him. “‘Ok, I just want sex’ or’ Ok, I want something more’? You’re not being very clear here, luv.”

Liam smiled back. “Ok, yes. I want something more. I’d like to give it a try at least.”

“Good.” Spike visibly relaxed, his smile widening. “So no more flirting with girls then?”

“Or guys.”

“Or guys,” Spike concurred with a laugh. He gazed after a car, whooshing past them, and then turned back to Liam. “Think you can maybe give me a kiss then? Seems a waste to just sit here and not do anything.”

Liam grinned and then he reached over, curling his fingers behind Spike’s neck, and pulled him in. It was a gentler kiss this time, soft but insistent and it didn’t take long until their lips were parting. Liam slipped his tongue inside Spike’s mouth, tasting coffee and pancakes and maple syrup in a wonderful bittersweet mix. The kiss deepened, becoming hotter and more passionate. It was making his head spin. He was so caught up in the taste and feel of Spike that he didn’t notice the hand on his thigh until it was slipping over the bulge in his pants, squeezing it lightly. Oh God.

“Spike…”

“William. Will. My name is Will,” Spike panted in his ear and tugged at his belt.

“Ok. Ok. Will. Are… are we gonna…?”

“I want to touch you, ok?” Spike’s fingers wiggled in between the buttons of Liam’s jeans, stroking him through the thin boxers. “Want to watch you come all over my hand.”

“Oh God. O-ok.” Liam closed his eyes, his head falling back as Spike loosened his pants and tugged down his boxers, allowing his cock to finally spring free. This was… Jesus! Spike’s fingers closed around his erection just as his lips locked on Liam’s neck, sucking a wet trail of kisses down his throat.

“Fuck, you taste good. So bloody good. I’ve been wanting to taste you all morning.”

He added a twist to his stroke and it took all of Liam’s willpower to not come right that minute.

“You… you always talk this much?” he gasped and arched into another vicious tug and twist.

Spike’s laughter vibrated against his skin. “I don’t know. Guess you have to find out.” He licked down to Liam’s collarbone and then bit down, hard. That was all it took and Liam came with a sharp yell, spilling all over Spike’s fingers.

They stayed still for a while, Spike panting into Liam’s neck, Liam staring wide-eyed up at the ceiling of the car, his knees shaking as he tried to catch his breath.

Finally Spike looked up, grinning at Liam with spit-slick and swollen lips. “You’re a loud one,” he said. He lifted his hand and studied the white come covering his fingers then pulled a couple of napkins out of his pocket and wiped himself clean before shooting Liam a smirk. “I hope that flat of yours is soundproofed or we might get evicted.”

Liam could feel himself blushing and he scowled. It then turned into a mischievous grin and he leaned over, brushing his lips over Spike’s as he slowly slipped his hand inside his loose sweats. No underwear. How nice of him.

“How ‘bout you then?” He curled his fingers around Spike’s cock, squeezing it hard. It throbbed in his hand, skin velvet soft and furnace hot. “You think you’re gonna stay quiet when I’ve got you on your back, wrists pinned to the bed, fucking you so hard you see stars? Nuhuh.” He tugged, never relenting his grip. “I think you’re gonna scream like the little bitch you are.”

Spike whimpered, lips pressed tight together in an effort to keep silent, and then he came violently, shuddering and slumping forward. Liam pulled his hand away with a smirk and wiped it on Spike’s sweats. “Guess you need another pair of pants, William.”

“Bastard.” Spike looked down at the dark stain on the front of his pants with a grimace. “These are your trousers, you know? You just made me come in _your_ trousers.”

Liam just laughed and tucked himself in before starting the car and pulling back onto the road, completely ignoring Spike’s loud muttering about lack of manners and the pain of cleaning dried come out of pubic hair.

“My jeans better be dry or I’ll be mooning every bloody police car from here to New York,” he said as he reached for his clothes spread out on the backseat.

“You wouldn’t!”

“Watch me.”

And Liam did. Watch as Spike scooted out of his sticky sweats and then with much difficulty manoeuvred the still slightly damp jeans up his legs and over his hips, cursing as his wet pubic hair got caught in the zipper. He probably shouldn’t ogle the kid like that but really, could anyone blame him? Judging from the smirk Spike shot him when he finally sat back, all dressed, _he_ certainly didn’t.

\----------------

It was late by the time they reached New York. Liam had been hoping they would arrive early enough that he’d have time to check on his paintings, to make sure they’d arrived safely at the gallery. But instead it was closing in on midnight when he pulled out the key to the small apartment that would serve as his, and now their, home for the next three months. He was exhausted after climbing ten flights of stairs since the elevator was broken, and Spike didn’t look much better off where he stood slumped up against the wall in the hallway as Liam juggled the key in the lock.

“Here we go.”

He reached in to flick on the lights and then they stood in the doorway, staring in.

He’d been told it was a “bright and friendly apartment” so he’d been expecting something tiny with big ugly windows. He couldn’t have been further from the truth.

It had windows alright but they were anything but ugly, made of multiple small squares of glass that allowed them a magnificent view of the now illuminated city. The walls were painted in a silky off-white colour and the floors were a beautiful whitewashed wood.

They stepped inside and walked around in a kind of haze, taking in the spacious rooms and the modern but still comfortable furniture.

“Wow. That gallery must like you a lot,” Spike finally said and quirked his eyebrow at Liam. “You sure they didn’t mistake you for someone important?”

“I don’t know, wasn’t really the gallery. Some sponsor paid for this,” Liam admitted then turned to shoot Spike a glare. “Hey, who says I’m not important?”

Spike just grinned and walked into the kitchen, flinging the fridge open and sticking his head inside. “Cool, they stocked it. With beer and everything.” He came out with a couple of beers, tossing one to Liam who only just managed to catch it. “This is fabulous.”

“Yeah.” Liam twisted the cap off and took a deep swig before once again looking around. “I didn’t really expect anything like this.”

He hosted his duffel bag and walked in the small hallway to check the other rooms. The bathroom had a big bathtub and a shower stall, there was a small laundry room and… Ok. He dumped the bag and walked back to find Spike sprawled on the couch in the living room, flipping through the channels on the TV.

“There’s only one bedroom,” he said awkwardly and waited for Spike to jump up and glare at him suspiciously. Instead he glanced lazily over his shoulder before turning his eyes back to the screen.

“Yeah? Hey, you seen this?” He waved the remote at the TV. “I think there must be at least fifty channels.”

“You’re ok with that?” Liam asked puzzled.

“Well, yeah. Do you know how bloody awful the selection at motels is? Unless you’re willing to pay and I’m not throwing away money on that unless it’s porn,” Spike said with a huff and then sat up straighter. “Ooh, think there’s porn here?” He started flicking faster.

“No, I mean the bed. There’s the couch but…”

“Is it a tiny bed?” Spike’s voice was calm, almost condescending.

“Uh, no. It’s a regular king-size. What’s that…?”

“Then what’s the problem?” Spike turned slightly on the couch and gazed up at him. “If we’re gonna be shagging we’ll be sharing a bed anyway. Unless you’d planned to throw me out of it every time we’re done? ‘Cos that’s not on if you value your family jewels, pet.”

He turned forward again, raising the remote. “Cheeky bugger. He’ll fuck me but he won’t share his bed,” he muttered as if to himself but he sounded more amused than annoyed.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just…”

Spike waved his hand dismissively. “Sshh, I’m trying to watch here.”

Liam stared at him, unsure whether to feel insulted or aroused. So they were going to be sharing a bed, apparently tonight already, and, as far as he could tell from Spike’s words, there would be sex.

Yeah, he was gonna go with aroused. It seemed more appropriate.

“Uh… I’m gonna… shower. And… we should probably eat something. I’ll just…” He nodded awkwardly to himself. “Yeah.” Bathroom… that way.

“Liam?”

He swung around, holding his breath. “Yes?”

“Don’t use up all the hot water. I’ve still got spunk in my curlies.”

Liam’s face went deep red and he cursed inwardly. He was the adult here, the more experienced one. Why the fuck did he let Spike get to him like this? The kid was getting cocky with confidence and even if it was a nice change from the suspicious way he’d been before it wouldn’t do to let him think he was holding all the ropes.

“Maybe you should join me. Save time _and_ water.”

Spike stilled and for a moment Liam thought he’d maybe made a mistake. Maybe Spike really was all talk and no action? Maybe he wasn’t really planning on…

The TV-screen turned black and Spike stood up, pulling the t-shirt over his head and throwing it aside. He turned around and cocked his head, eyes darkening as he licked his lips. “Sounds good,” he said and started unbuttoning his jeans.

Liam swallowed, unable to tear his eyes away. There really was nothing at all wrong with that body. God. Lean and strong muscles moved sensually under smooth pale skin as Spike bent and stretched while systematically pulling off his clothes, one item at a time. It was like watching a documentary on feline mating rituals and Liam was seriously expecting David Attenborough to pop up his head any minute now and start describing the events as they unfolded. Spike finally tugged his socks off and then straightened up, butt naked.

“You planning on taking a shower with your clothes on?” he asked with an amused glint in his eye.

Suddenly Liam felt insufferably hot, a sheen of sweat gluing the clothes to his body. He kept his eyes on Spike as he pulled his t-shirt off, looking and hoping for a sign of approval. He felt relieved when Spike’s face flushed slightly and his eyes grew even darker. He knew he was far from being in the same shape as Spike was, something he was going to work on as soon as possible, but to most standards he looked alright. He used to do tai chi in the mornings, as a sort of cleansing and mind-focus ritual before getting to work on his paintings, and he enjoyed a run every now and then through Griffith Park back in LA. He wasn’t fat, far from it, but he wasn’t as toned as he would have liked either. Not that he usually worried much about his appearances but then again he hadn’t really had anyone he’d wanted to impress in quite a long time.

All his worries quickly dispersed though when Spike stepped forward with a hungry look in his eyes, reaching out to run a hand over Liam’s chest. “Let’s make that shower a quick one, yeah?” He breathed in and then slowly out again. “I’m suddenly feeling very much ready for bed.”

God, yes! “Yeah, me too.”

Liam quickly unbuttoned his pants and pulled down the zipper. There was nothing gracious or feline-like in his movements as he got rid off the rest of his clothes. In fact he felt more like a stumbling monkey, getting one foot caught in his pants and dropping the heavy buckle of his belt on his toes. Spike didn’t seem to notice though, he just stood watching with heavy-lid eyes and then pushed Liam toward the bathroom as soon as he had pulled his socks off.

“Gonna get you clean and then you can get me dirty,” Spike growled as he reached in to turn on the shower. “How’s that sound?”

“Dirty?” Liam breathed. “I like the sound of that.”

“Figured you would,” Spike laughed and pulled him in and under the water.

The warm water felt incredibly good crashing down on them and Liam could feel his tired muscles slowly relaxing. Spike’s hand rested on Liam’s hip, thumb stroking slowly over his hipbone. He let his own hands wander, down Spike’s arms then sliding over his hips before pulling him closer. Spike gasped as his erection bumped into Liam’s thigh, his head dropping forward to rest on Liam’s chest.

“Think maybe we can hurry this up? Unless…” He looked up, water plastering his hair to his face and clinging to his eyelashes, lips tugged into a smile. “Unless you’d like me to drop the soap?”

Liam groaned. “Fuck. Don’t say things like that or it will all be over and done with before you have time to drop anything.”

“Yeah?” Spike let his fingers run up from Liam’s hip and across his back. “As much as I love you all wet I’d rather we did this on the bed. The first time anyway.”

“Uhuh.”

Liam nodded slowly, feeling dazed. He hadn’t actually had sex since… When was it again? Felt like a lifetime. He closed his eyes as he tried to get himself under control. That college boy he hooked up with at Caritas? That was what? Six months ago? Christ, no wonder his downstairs brain was taking over.

Dirty was exactly what it was. Despite all of Spike’s reassurances he still felt guilty. Like he was taking advantage of someone much younger who he should be looking out for. This was all happening way too fast. What the hell was he doing?

“You okay?”

Liam opened his eyes to find Spike watching him warily. “Yeah. Great. I’m just… You sure we should be doing this so soon?”

“Christ. Are you serious?” Spike groaned. “You know, it’s all fine and dandy to be a gentleman or whatever you think you’re doing but my bollocks are about to explode so if you don’t mind I’d like to have some sex now, thanks.”

“Your balls can’t really explode,” Liam said lamely.

“Liam!” Spike shut off the water and stepped out of the shower, grabbing one towel for himself and throwing the other to Liam. “I’m going to dry myself off now and then I’m going to lie down, naked, on the bed. Join me or don’t join me, your choice.” He sighed at the uncomfortable look on Liam’s face. “Look, no one said we had to shag, ok? We can just…” He grimaced. “Cuddle. Or something.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to. Christ, of course I do. It’s just… We only met two days ago and maybe we should get to know each other better before we start with the whole sex thing.” Liam’s voice trailed off and he shifted awkwardly on his feet.

Spike just frowned and Liam could feel himself blushing. He felt pretty stupid, standing butt naked in the bathroom with a gorgeously hot young guy, babbling about how they maybe _shouldn’t_ have sex. It was all rather ridiculous. Hell, a few years ago he would have jumped at the opportunity but he wasn’t a horny teenager anymore. Spike, on the other hand, was.

“I just don’t want you doing anything you might regret,” he tried. “It’s not like you can just run out of here if this doesn’t work out. Well, I guess you could but…”

Spike’s face softened and he shook his head with a smile. “Liam. Come on. You’re not taking advantage of me and I’m not doing anything I don’t want to. I’m not a kid and you’re not a dirty old man.” Spike rubbed his hair with the towel, then tossed it over the rink of the bath tub. “Alright, now that’s sorted out how about we at least go lie down? I’m knackered.”

He turned around and walked out of the bathroom, giving Liam a perfect view of his perfect ass. Liam looked down at the towel in his hands then dried himself off quickly, before hanging up both towels on the rack. He really should brush his teeth, he thought fleetingly, but his toothbrush was in the bag which was in the bedroom and he had a feeling once he got in there he wouldn’t be coming out again anytime soon. Oh hell, not that Spike could complain. _He_ didn’t even _have_ a toothbrush.

Liam hesitated in the hallway, his stomach doing a quick flip-flop, then pushed the door to the bedroom open. True to his words Spike was lying on the bed, not a stitch on him. His eyes were closed and he had one hand tugged under his head, the other was on his cock, fingers stroking slowly up and down the shaft. Liam stopped short, taking a moment to savour the sight. The kid really was beautiful and, like he kept pointing out, not really a kid. His muscles were well defined, his body lean without being too wiry or butch, and even if he was pale there was nothing sickly about him. But noticeable of all was his face. He had sharp cheekbones and a firm chin that gave the impression of strength and determination but at the same time the full lips and wide blue eyes made him seem almost vulnerable. Liam had a feeling there was much of Spike he didn’t know yet and he could only hope he would be allowed to unravel the mystery as they got to know each other better.

“Hey.”

He was startled out of his musings to find Spike watching him, a questioning look in his eyes.

“Hey.” He took a step closer, then stopped.

“Look, what I said… We don’t have to if you don’t want to. It’s alright. I can take care of myself.”

Liam breathed out and then walked over, crawling onto the bed. “Yes, but it’s so much more fun if I do it for you.” He allowed Spike only a second to grin before kissing him.

It was different from the kiss they’d shared at the motel or the ones they indulged in by the side of the road before jerking each other off. Neither of those had really started out with any other intent than to kiss, even if the latter one had then turned into something more. But this one… This one was meant to ignite, to bring up the heat until they were both bursting with need and passion.

With every stroke and stab of his tongue Liam moved closer, until he was hovering over Spike, his cock marking a sticky trail up between Spike’s thighs until it was nudging at his balls, almost hard enough to hurt. Spike’s hands were clutching Liam’s biceps, his hips thrusting helplessly up in an attempt to bring Liam even closer. When Liam lowered his body on top of Spike’s, pinning him to the bed with his weight, Spike whimpered almost pitifully, shallow pants licking Liam’s neck as he shivered underneath him. His hands fell away, landing above his head, and Liam grabbed the wrists hard. He could feel Spike’s heartbeat speed up in sync with his breathing. It drummed against his palms like a scared rabbit’s but there was no fear in Spike’s eyes, just burning heat.

“You like that?” Liam growled in Spike’s ear, his fingers tightening around Spike’s wrists. “You like being at my mercy?”

“Fuck.” Spike bucked underneath him, struggling half-heartedly before letting his head fall back down, eyes closed. “Yeah. God.”

Liam bit his earlobe and then proceeded to nibble his way down Spike’s throat and to his collarbone, leaving a trail of dark-pink crescent marks that stood out sharply on the pale skin. “Want to taste you. Want to fucking devour you.”

“Jesus!” Spike chuckled breathlessly. “What happened to ‘Maybe we shouldn’t do this’?”

“You want me to stop?” Liam brought Spike’s wrists together, pinning them down with one hand as he moved the other down and under Spike’s ass, prying apart his cheeks. “Because I can stop alright. I can let you go right now and-“

“Don’t you dare! Don’t you fucking dare, you sodding cock-teasing wanker.” Spike threw his head back, exposing a long pale throat. “Oh God.”

“Fuck, you look so good. You are so damn hot.” Liam prodded at Spike’s entrance, teasing a finger inside just up to the first knuckle. Where was the lube? And condoms. Did they even have any? Oh God, please let Spike have some.

“You… Oh God. You have anything?”

“Jacket.” Spike groaned as Liam pulled out his finger. “Fuck.”

Liam rolled off and stalked down the hall, finding Spike’s jacket thrown over one of the kitchen chairs. He rummaged through the pockets and came up with a strand of condoms and a half-finished tube of lubrication. Hurrying back into the bedroom he decisively didn’t think about who had reaped the benefit of the other half. Spike hadn’t moved, his eyes were still closed and his hands rested above his head, still in place, even if Liam hadn’t asked him to. Christ.

He crawled back upon the bed, pushing Spike’s knees up as he positioned himself between them. This was all going completely different from what he’d imagined. This wasn’t slow or sweet or even plain quick fucking. Frankly he had no idea where all this aggressiveness was coming from. If anything he was used to being the ‘bottom’ in his relationships. Well, the only long relationship he’d had, with Lindsey. Which, when he thought about it, was weird, because he sure liked this a hell of a lot more. He wasn’t that surprised at Spike’s submission, the cocky ones were often the first to fold. Question was how far that reached. Not that he was hankering for a full-out kinky relationship like that but the possibilities it presented were tantalising.

Spike only tensed slightly as the first finger slipped inside. His eyes flew open at the second and when Liam started scissoring his fingers he groaned loudly before pushing back, urging him deeper.

“Good?” Liam’s voice was hoarse and he leaned over, mouthing Spike’s Adam’s apple. “Tell me,” he growled when all he got was a low whimpering.

“Oh God. So good. Christ, Liam…” Spike arched beneath him, his whole body shivering as Liam sucked on his throat. “Want you… Need…” He moaned and pushed back again. “Please.”

“Fuck, yeah. Ok.” Liam sat back and ripped the wrapper of one condom before rolling it over his cock with trembling fingers. Jesus, they were really doing this! He kept his eyes on Spike’s face, watching for any sign of discomfort as he pushed slowly inside. “Alright?”

“Yeah. Jesus fuck.”

Spike held his breath and Liam pushed in the last few inches. Oh God. He froze, staring down at Spike.

“It’s ok,” Spike panted. “You can move.”

Liam shook his head. “Nuhuh. Not if you don’t want this over in five seconds.”

Spike laughed hoarsely and Liam had to hold his breath to keep from coming right then. Jesus! He breathed out slowly and then in again even slower, repeating it until the tightening feeling in his balls finally subsided.

“Ok, ok.” He swallowed. “You ready?”

“Ready to bloody well kill you if you don’t move soon.”

Liam grinned and then he pulled slowly out until only the tip of his cock rested inside. He paused for a moment, enjoying the desperate look in Spike’s eyes, and then slammed back in.

“Bloody fucking…!” Spike gasped. “Hell!” he finally managed to get out just before Liam slammed into him again.

He set up a steady rhythm, fucking Spike with more force than he could remember ever using with anyone before. He’d be worried about hurting him except the way Spike was moaning and egging him on with breathy ‘More’ and ‘Harder’ and ‘Fuck, yes’ didn’t sound as if he was in any pain that he wasn’t at least enjoying.

He had to stop a few times when he was too close to the edge, breathing heavily as Spike clenched around him, head thrown back and eyes closed. They were both drenched with sweat and when Liam leaned over and licked Spike’s throat he whimpered almost pitifully and pushed up against his mouth. Liam pressed harder, digging his teeth in as he bit around the Adam’s apple. He could hear Spike’s breathing falter, his ragged panting turning into wheezing as he struggled to get more air into his lungs. Liam’s hands were once again gripping Spike’s wrists and he could feel Spike’s fingernails scratching the inside of his wrists and then he was coming hard, squeezing Liam’s cock tight with every convulsion. White light exploded behind Liam’s eyes and he had to let go of Spike’s throat in favour of gasping for breath. Exhausted he slumped down, face buried in Spike’s neck.

That was it. Stick a fork in him, he was done.

Next thing he was aware of was something poking him in his side, hard.

“Oi! Liam! You’re smothering me.”

“Wha…?”

He groaned and rolled off Spike, ending on his back, blinking up at the ceiling. Then he abruptly sat up, staring down at Spike in panic. “Oh God! Did I…?” There were red teeth marks on Spike’s throat and his eyes were wet at the corners. Shit. “I don’t know what came over me. Are you hurt?”

Spike grinned, reaching up to touch his throat lightly with his fingertips. “Nah. I liked it.” His voice was slightly hoarse and he grimaced when he swallowed.

“God!” Liam rubbed one hand over his face. “I could have… Jesus. I swear, I’ve never done anything like that before.”

“Aww, makes me feel all special.” Spike smirked up at him but his face went soft when Liam hung his head shamefully. “Hey, it’s alright. I told you, I liked it.” He quirked his eyebrow. “Guess I have a bit of a breath kink. And you’re quite the biter.” He bared his teeth and laughed.

Liam swallowed. He reached over and ran his fingers over Spike’s throat, feeling the indents of the bitemarks under his fingertips. “That’s gonna bruise.”

“Yeah?” Spike grabbed his hand and kissed the palm. “Good.” He yawned and closed his eyes. “Sleep?”

Liam nodded slowly, feeling light-headed. “Yeah.”

He looked down to find the condom still hanging off his now limp cock and he removed it with a grimace, tying a knot on the end and tossing it on the floor. Spike’s come was already drying in white flakes on both their stomachs and Liam brushed most of it off before reaching for the cover and pulling it over the both of them. He lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling until Spike rolled over on his side and snuggled up to him, one leg thrown over his and a hand resting on his stomach. Then exhaustion won over and he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

The next morning he woke up to a wicked looking Spike grinning down at him before sliding down the bed to take his cock in his mouth. Was only then, as Liam moved to dig his fingers into Spike’s hair, that he realised that his hands were tied to the headboard with his own socks.

He had a feeling he was in for an interesting summer.


	3. Chapter 3

He wasn’t sure what he had expected it to be like, living with Spike. Well, he’d had an inkling Spike might be a slob, like most teenage boys, but after grumbling about wet towels on the floor and dirty underwear stuck in between the cushions of the couch for the hundredth time, he decided it wasn’t worth the aggravation and resigned to only griping every other time instead.

The thing was that they were incredibly different.

Spike liked to stay up late while Liam preferred to settle in early, and he liked to sleep in while Liam was up at the crack of dawn. Spike ate burgers and fries and gulped down beer and caffeinated sodas while Liam insisted on light meals and drank wine or water. Spike yelled at the TV while watching sports and soaps. Liam closed himself off in the bedroom, reading nineteenth century novels. He painted and planned the exhibition at the gallery. Spike got a part-time job at a small vintage record store and blasted British punk whenever he was left in charge.

His first paycheck he used to first pay Liam back what he owed him and then to buy cigarettes. He lit up with such a look on ecstasy on his face that Liam asked him why he hadn’t borrowed money to buy some before, to which Spike replied that he was a whore for many things but fags were his own treat. And then had a laughing fit as Liam blushed and asked, “Fags? You mean like … boys?” Liam got his revenge by banning all smoking inside the apartment, a rule he broke himself by reaching for one the next night when they lay panting and sweaty in bed. “Post-coital smoking doesn’t count,” he argued and Spike told him to buy his own bloody smokes then because he couldn’t afford Liam bumming him for one “every couple of hours.”

So there were differences and arguing, teasing and testing each other’s boundaries. The usual ritual people go through when moving in together. But in general they got along amazingly well.

First of all, the sex was fabulous. There was no other word for it. Liam couldn’t remember ever having so much sex, let alone such great sex. Such mind-blowing, adventurous, and kinky sex, to be exact. They tested each other out carefully, finding out kinks and likes they never knew they had, and ruled out others in the process. It was fun and exciting and at times weird and awkward but they learned to read each other, knowing which lines could be crossed and which shouldn’t.

They liked bondage and biting and breathplay but Spike couldn’t stand being gagged and Liam shied away from spanking. Spike had disliked Liam calling him a kid until one night when he counteracted by sarcastically calling Liam ‘daddy’ and Liam almost came in his pants. After that he used it relentlessly. Liam had a sweet tooth, constantly wanting to lick chocolate and cream and other sweet things of Spike’s body. Spike poured tequila on Liam’s belly and licked salt of his chest then kissed him with lime between his teeth. Spike loved public display of affection and after a while Liam got used to it, even started to like it to the extent that he kept trying to find new ways to surprise Spike with kisses and touches.

Second, they actually enjoyed bickering. Possibly influenced by the fact that getting riled up turned Spike on like nothing else and when he ran out of argument he shut Liam up by sticking his tongue down his throat and his hands down Liam’s pants. And really, Liam was fine with giving up whatever he had been fighting so vigorously for, if it meant he got an orgasm instead.

Third, and that was probably the most important part, whatever they were feeling about this thing they had going, it was more real than either of them had felt for anyone before. They hadn’t exactly put words to it but Liam would catch this look in Spike’s eyes that made him hitch his breath and sometimes when he thought about Spike while painting he would stop and stare into space, just overwhelmed with these feelings that he was slightly afraid to analyze.

The only thing they’d really fought about was Spike’s refusal to call his father. He claimed there was no point, that they had nothing to say to each other and it would all just end up a big mess. Liam didn’t agree but since he didn’t have any idea where Spike’s father lived in England or even his name, there was very little he could do. That still didn’t keep him from bringing it up as often as he could without risking Spike storming out in a huff. Which he still did a few times but he always came back after a couple of hours and they made up in all the best ways possible. Liam hoped that with time he would be able to convince Spike to relent and at least send his old man a postcard.

As the date of the grand opening of his exhibition grew nearer Liam found himself getting more and more nervous. He’d held small shows before but nothing of this standard. It had first been scheduled to open a week after his arrival but had to be pushed back as the gallery suffered some water damage. As it was the big day wasn’t until they’d been in New York for three weeks and he was starting to get impatient.

\-----

It was a beautiful evening on the first Saturday of June when he straightened his tie and looked critically over himself in the mirror. He probably should go for more trendy clothes, seeing as some of the biggest names of New York’s more bohemian world were expected to drop by, but he’d never really had any fashion sense and he’d rather feel comfortable in his own clothes than awkward in something flashy that the gallery could pick out for him.

There was a soft cough behind him and he turned around to find Spike watching him with an appreciative smile.

“You look great, luv.” He twitched his nose. “Old and boring, but great.”

“Haha, funny.” Liam turned back to the mirror, frowning. “Really? Boring?”

He saw Spike’s reflection smile at him. “Nah. Classy. Sophisticated.”

“Boring,” Liam admitted with a sigh. “What are you wearing?”

“Me?” Spike straightened up, licking his lips uncertainly. “You want me to come?”

Liam swung around, staring at him. “Of course. Why, you don’t want to?”

Spike ducked his head, shifting awkwardly. “Well, yeah. ‘Course I do. You just never said so I… I don’t know. I thought maybe you’d rather I didn’t.”

Liam blinked. Had he really never said anything about it? Damn. He walked up to Spike and kissed him, a slow gentle kiss that still had his heart speeding up. Then he pulled back and smiled. “Can’t show up without a date, can I?”

Spike did a miserable job of hiding his relief. “Better not. Some pansy artist might make a move on you. Or worse, a woman!” His cheeks were slightly flushed as he stalked over to the closet and threw the door open. “I’m not wearing a suit though. Never liked ties. They’re like a bloody noose around the neck.”

Liam walked up behind him and let his hand slide up to his throat, squeezing lightly. “And here I thought you liked being strangled.”

Spike sucked in his breath, pressing his backside hard against Liam’s erection. “When you put it like that…”

“How about you wear the striped jeans and the white shirt under the black jacket? Casual but nice. And I’ll let you borrow one of my ties.”

Spike swallowed, his throat contracting beneath Liam’s palm. “If you’re using my kink just to make me wear a tie, I’m gonna get drunk on champagne and moon the elite crowd at your show.”

“Don’t think they’re expecting that kind of exhibition,” Liam chuckled softly and bit down on Spike’s earlobe. “Wear it, don’t wear it, I don’t care. But if you _do_ wear it I’ll fuck you in the restroom. Wrapping the tie around my fist.”

“Fuck!” Spike turned around and smashed their lips together, kissing Liam until they both had to jerk away for air. “Christ. When we gotta be there? Because I need you. Right the fuck now!”

Liam closed his eyes for a second and then kissed Spike again, gentler this time. “Don’t. We can’t. Cordy said to be there at six or she’d have my hide.”

Spike groaned and reluctantly pulled away. “Well, she can’t have it, cause it’s mine.” He pouted. “That woman is a bloody tyrant, you know? She orders you around like a dog.”

“She’s good at what she does,” Liam argued although he kind of agreed with him. The gallery manager was quite pushy, definitely one used to people following her orders.

“Yeah, I guess. She’s also got a nice rack,” Spike added with a leer.

“Spike!”

“What?” Spike rolled his eyes and pulled out the clothes Liam had suggested, throwing them on the bed. “It’s kinda hard to miss, with all the cleavage she keeps shoving in my face every time I pop by.”

Liam snorted. “Don’t flatter yourself, she does that to everybody. Even me.”

“I noticed.”

Spike voice was strangely flat and Liam gave him a puzzled look. “Are you jealous?”

“No.” Spike shrugged. “Just figured you’d never told ‘em, ‘bout you being gay. Thought maybe that was why…” He turned away, snatching the jeans of the bed. “Forget it.”

Liam grabbed his arm, swinging him around. “No. You thought maybe that was why what?”

Spike shook him off. “Thought maybe that was why you hadn’t invited me but now you have so it doesn’t matter, alright?” He tugged on his jeans and buttoned them up with an air of irritation.

“Look, I’m sorry. I honestly didn’t realise I hadn’t formally invited you.” Liam ran his fingers tiredly through his hair. “I thought you knew I expected you to be there. As my date.”

“Yeah? Well, I didn’t.” Spike pulled on the white shirt and buttoned it up. “What with you always introducing me to all your artsy friends as ‘my friend William.’ Hate that name, by the way,” he added with a scowl. “There’s a reason why I don’t use it.”

Liam just stared at him. “You never said. I didn’t… It just felt a bit weird introducing you as Spike and I never use Will except… you know.” He blushed. “You should have said something.”

Spike sighed and went to dig through the drawers, pulling out a pair of socks. “Not gonna throw a tantrum over a name, am I? It’s _my_ name. I just don’t like it.” He sat down on the bed and pulled the socks on. “Makes me feel like I’m back in school, feeling stupid and all wrong. They used to pick on me, you know? Push me around and call me names. Calling me queer.” He gave a short laugh. “I had to ask my mum what it meant, fancy that?”

Liam watched him warily. “I’m sorry. Must have been hard.”

“Not your fault.” Spike shrugged and stood up. “Anyway, it was a long time ago.”

Not that long. Liam was once again reminded of how young Spike actually was. Sometimes he even wondered if Spike had lied to him, if perhaps he was younger than he said but then other times Spike discussed politics and world events in such a way that made him seem a lot older. To tell the truth, for all their long talks and intimacy he didn’t actually know that much about Spike.

“I’m still sorry.” He picked up the black jacket and held it up for Spike, straightening it on his shoulders when he’d shrugged it on. “And yes, she knows I’m gay. And she knows you’re my boyfriend.” He stopped, hands still on Spike’s shoulders. “You are, right?”

Spike gazed up at him and this time there was a hint of a smile on his lips. “Well, if I’m not there’s a whole lot of shagging been going on that needs explaining.”

“Right.” Liam laughed awkwardly. “Boyfriend it is then. Glad we cleared that up.”

“Good.” Spike started flicking through the rack of ties, scrunching up his nose in disdain at every one of them. “Hey, what’s weird about the name Spike?”

“Nothing. Except for it not being, you know, a “real” name. More like a dog’s name.”

“Oi! It’s not! Spike Lee, heard of him? And that guy in the Nothing Hill movie with Hugh Grant?”

“I don’t think that was his real name either. And Spike Lee’s real name is Shelton, I think. Where did you pick it up anyway?”

Spike blushed and studied the ties with avid interest. “Wasmcat,” he finally muttered.

“What?”

“It was my cat, alright? Don’t laugh!”

“I’m not laughing!” Just… smiling. Out loud.

Spike grumbled and picked a dark-blue tie, looping it around his neck with a grimace. “Hate these fucking things. Don’t even know how to… fuck!” he cursed as he fumbled with the knot.

“Here. Let me.” Liam tied a neat knot, his fingers lingering on Spike’s throat and he smiled as he felt a small shiver run through the boy. “You look good. Absolutely fuckable.”

“I always look fuckable,” Spike quipped and loosened the tie slightly. “You better make good on your promise or I’ll be the one tying you up tonight-”

“Not really seeing that as a bad thing,” Liam interrupted with a smirk.

“And then going to sleep, leaving you trussed up and horny until the morning,” Spike concluded as he walked out of the room and into the bathroom to fix his hair.

“You wouldn’t! Right? Right, Spike? Spike…”

\--------------------------

He wasn’t quite sure what he had expected but surely nothing like this. There were more elite artists and high-class benefactors crammed into the rather spacious gallery than he had met, or even heard of, his whole life. He didn’t know how Cordy had pulled it off but somehow she had managed to bring his name and art to the attention of all the people who really mattered. He was introduced to people he’d only ever read about before and they were all here to see _him_ and view _his_ art. It was quite mind blowing.

At first Spike had kept by his side, nodding a quiet acknowledgment to those Liam introduced him to, shaking the hands of those few that did more than glance his way. No one seemed bothered by his status as ‘boyfriend’ but then again this wasn’t the sort of crowd that would. A few women gave Liam a disappointed look but that was all.

But Cordy kept tugging Liam along to meet and greet more and more people and soon Spike waved him off with a reassuring smile and slinked away to stand in the corner, a glass of champagne in his hand, stuffing his mouth with chocolate covered strawberries. No one asked his age and Liam figured if he got too drunk then so be it. He was unlikely to start a scene or get Liam into trouble in any way. Liam just hoped he wasn’t too bored.

“Oh great! Finally!” Cordy tugged at his arm and pulled him away from a reporter from the Art in America magazine who’d been hanging on his arm, touching him way more than he thought necessary. “He’s here.”

Liam stumbled slightly as he swept his eyes across the room, trying to find Spike to make sure he was not passed out or mooning people. Or worse, gone.

“Who?” he asked absently.

“Your sponsor. Now just smile and be nice and please don’t tell that story of your art teacher again. It’s very sweet but very boring and if more people start yawning we’ll have to buy more champagne.”

Liam frowned at her. “It’s not bor-”

“Ah, Mr. McDonald! So glad you could make it.”

Liam’s head snapped up so fast he’d feel dizzy if he wasn’t too busy staring at the man standing in front of him, a lazy smile on his face.

“Hello there, Lee.”

Cordy blinked and then stared at Liam before looking back at Lindsey. “You two know each other?”

“Old friends,” Lindsey drawled and put out his hand, waiting for Liam to take it. “Ain’t that right, Liam?”

“Right. Friends.” Liam dazedly accepted the offer, the feel of Lindsey’s hand in his so familiar and still so foreign. “I didn’t know it was you.”

“Didn’t think you’d accept it if you did.”

“I probably wouldn’t have, no.”

Cordy’s face went from puzzled to worried and she licked her lips, waving at a waiter to come over with a tray of glasses. “Well, this is a nice surprise. Champagne?”

“Don’t mind if I do.” Lindsey took two glasses and offered one to Liam. “Too old times and new beginnings.”

Liam took the glass with a nod and sipped from it slowly. He honestly had no idea what to say. He’d been angry with the man for so long but everything was different now. It still hurt, he still felt betrayed, especially when Lindsey just stood there, smiling, as if nothing had happened.

But he’d been so happy the last three weeks, with Spike, that the past seemed insignificant in comparison. In fact, he probably wouldn’t even have met Spike if it hadn’t been for Lindsey and all that had gone down because of him.

Cordy smiled at Lindsey, gave Liam a warning glare, and then she was off to flirt with more important people, her heels clicking on the hardwood floors.

“You look good,” Lindsey finally said, tilting his head and smirking in a way that Liam had always found so sexy before.

“You look older,” Liam answered, unable to keep the cold out of his voice. “How’s Buffy?”

Lindsey’s face tightened. “Good. Home, taking care of the kids.”

Liam nodded. “Got many?”

“Two. A boy and a girl.” Lindsey stared at him challengingly but Liam only nodded again and after a moment’s silence Lindsey sighed. “Look, I know we didn’t part on the best of terms but…” He stopped when Liam laughed coldly. “Ok, maybe that’s an understatement.”

Liam shook his head in disbelief. “What do you want? Why did you do this, sponsor me? What did you hope to accomplish from all this?”

“Who says I want anything? Maybe I’m just trying to apologise? Did you think of that?” When Liam didn’t answer, Lindsey shrugged and looked away. “Plus most people would say I owed you.”

“You don’t owe me anything, Lindsey. If I’d known it was you behind this I would have said no.”

“Why do you think I made sure you didn’t?”

Liam shook his head again. “Whatever. If you’re here to apologise then apologise. If you’re here for something else, spit it out.”

Lindsey hesitated for a moment before nodding. “Alright. I’m sorry. And I mean that. I did a horrible thing and I don’t blame you for hating me.”

He paused and then lowered his voice. “Look, I’m not gay.” He blushed when Liam snorted. “Ok, I’ve been with men but it was never serious, just fooling around. Who doesn’t? It doesn’t mean anything.”

“You keep telling yourself that. Not that I really care, it’s your damn river not mine.” At Lindsey’s blank look Liam shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t hate you, Lindsey, I just really dislike you. But if it makes you feel better then ok, I forgive you. Water under the bridge.” He turned away. “Have a nice life.”

“Wait!” Lindsey grabbed his arm, turning him around. “Look, I did this, all of this, for you. Because I felt bad about what happened but also because you have talent and… and I still care about you. Can’t we…?”

“What? Be friends? Kiss and make up? I don’t think so, Linds. In fact, I think I’ll be going now.”

He tried to pull away but Lindsey tightened his hold on his arm, keeping him still. “You can’t leave your own opening party.”

“No? Watch me.” He scanned the room for Spike, still not finding him anywhere. Damn. Trust Spike to ruin his dramatic exit.

“Let me at least take you out for a drink.” Lindsey grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the door. “My hotel is just a few blocks-” His words were abruptly cut off as he was jerked away and punched to the floor with such force that he skid across it for a couple of feet.

“I think he said he was leaving,” Spike said casually and stuck a cigarette in his mouth, lighting it up. “You alright, luv?” he added as an afterthought. His eyes were still on Lindsey, who was wiping blood from the corner of his mouth, but his right hand, now bruised with split knuckles, reached over to rest on the small of Liam’s back.

“Spike!” Liam hissed, not sure what he was more horrified by; Spike punching Lindsey, his sponsor, in front of all these guests, or the fact that he was smoking inside one of New York’s finest art galleries. “What the hell are you doing?”

Spike just raised his eyebrow at him and blew out a ring of smoke. “You promised to fuck me in the restroom. I’ve been waiting. Remember that deal we made?” He stuck the cigarette between his pinched lips and moved both hands down as if to unbutton his jeans.

Liam stared at him and then he suddenly burst out laughing, drawing the attention of the few that hadn’t already turned to gaze at the display. “You…!” He sucked in his breath between gasps of laughter. “Jesus Christ! I can’t believe you just did that. God, I love you.”

Spike froze. Then he slowly raised his head, a smile tugging at his lips as he removed the cigarette. “Yeah?”

“Yes. I do.” The grin softened and Liam gazed at Spike lovingly. “I really, really do.”

He took Spike’s hand and drew him closer, eyes locked with his. His hands moved up to Spike’s face, enveloping it gently, and then he bowed his head and softly kissed him. Spike’s arms instinctively came up around Liam’s waist, pulling him even tighter, the cigarette tumbling from his fingers to the floor in a rain of red sparks. He opened his mouth, allowing Liam to slip his tongue inside as he breathed a happy sigh. He was warm in Liam’s arms, his mouth tasting of champagne and chocolate strawberries and the slightest hint of tobacco. When Liam’s fingers curled around Spike’s ears he whimpered softly, his breath hitching, and Liam felt happier than he could ever remember feeling in his whole life.

He was vaguely aware of people watching them, some chuckling, others talking in hushed voices, and he more sensed than saw Lindsey get to his feet and being dragged away by Cordy. There would probably be hell to pay for this. Sales and reviews might be withdrawn, Lindsey’s sponsoring money would all likely disappear and they’d lose the apartment. Cordy would string him up by his balls.

At this very moment he couldn’t bring himself to care. At all.

When Liam finally pulled away and opened his eyes he found Spike gazing up at him with such happiness it made his heart clench, especially when his whole face split into the most glorious smile Liam had ever seen. The crowd had dispersed now that the initial drama was over and for all he cared they could have been the only two people in the whole world. Liam rubbed his thumb over Spike’s kiss-swollen lips and smiled.

“You ready to get out of here?”

Spike nodded. “Yeah.” They started to move toward the door when he stopped and slipped from under Liam’s arm. “Hang on.”

For a moment Liam though he was going back to punch Lindsey again but Spike had more important things in mind. He snagged an un-open bottle of champagne from under the table of hourse d’ouvres and swaggered back, swinging it triumphantly. “ _Now_ we can go.”

Liam laughed and pulled him in, kissing the top of his head. “Trust you to keep your priorities straight.”

They made out in the cab on the way home and were already undressing each other before they were halfway up to the apartment. They stumbled out of the elevator, Liam dragging Spike along by his tie, and crashed into the opposite wall, kissing like crazy. Liam fumbled with the keys as he pulled Spike toward the door to their apartment, unlocked it and shoved Spike inside before slamming the door behind them.

“Wanna fuck you so bad.”

“Yeah. Fuck yeah.” Spike was gasping, the tie tightening around his neck as Liam twisted it around his fist. “Do it. Fuck me, Liam. C’mon.”

They never even made it to the bedroom. Liam bent Spike over the kitchen table, holding him in place with the tie strangling his neck and his hips pushing Spike’s thighs apart. He tugged at Spike’s jeans, popping the button and pulling down the zipper so hard the denim creaked in protest. Spike was gripping the edges of the table, his knuckles turning white as he held on tight. Liam pushed the jeans down and lifted the bottom of Spike’s shirt then sank down on his hunches to lick the pale cheeks. He could hear Spike strangled grunting and let the tie slacken slightly.

“Love your ass. Fuck, you taste so good.” He tugged on the tie once more, just to hear Spike whimper and then let go of it to cup Spike’s cheeks in his hands instead, spreading them open with his thumbs. “Gonna fuck you with my tongue, Will.”

He licked over the exposed entrance, moaning when Spike jerked away only to then eagerly push back a second later. He didn’t waste more time but wiggled his tongue inside, loving how the tight muscle slowly loosened and opened up to let him further in. Spike was whimpering above him, legs spread as far apart as the jeans would let him, pushing his ass back to urge Liam deeper. When Liam finally pulled away his face was wet and Spike was trembling. His knees suddenly buckled and he would have crumbled to the floor if it hadn’t been for Liam holding him up.

“Want me to fuck you here or on the bed? Tell me what you want,” he growled in Spike’s ear, wiping his face clean on the white shirt. His fingers tightened around the tie and he pulled Spike back by the neck. “Tell me!”

“Fuck me here. Hard. Wanna feel it.” The voice was hoarse, shallow pants rasping through the abused throat.

“Yeah. Yeah, baby.” Liam undid his own pants and let them fall down to pool around his ankles as he reached for a bottle of olive oil on the kitchen counter. “I’m gonna fuck you so hard,” he growled as he popped the cap open and poured the golden liquid over his cock. It dripped on the floor and his shoes and when he pushed Spike’s shirt further up on his back it left yellow fingerprints on the white cotton.

He slipped one finger inside first, slicking Spike up with the oil, before pulling out and pushing his cock in. It was tight after such little preparation but Spike didn’t complain, just tightened his hold on the table and pushed back, trying to get him deeper.

“That good? Fuck, you’re so tight. So damn tight.”

“You… always talk… so much?” Spike stuttered, his right hand slipping on the table, making the tie tighten even further around his neck and his eyes bulged. Liam quickly moved to loosen it but Spike shook his head and just closed his eyes, swaying slightly. “Come on, fuck me before I pass out.”

Liam sucked in his breath and wrapped one arm around Spike’s waist to keep the table from digging into his stomach before starting to slam into him with all his force. Spike let out a strangled yell and his knees buckled again, leaving it to Liam to hold him up as he fucked him hard and fast. There was no way he’d last long, not with Spike’s rasped gasps for breath getting shallower and shallower as his head got lighter, and he wrapped his fingers around Spike’s cock, stroking it hard. Spike cried out and then he was coating Liam’s fingers with his come and that was all Liam needed. He bit down onto Spike’s shoulders, muffling his own cry as he came violently.

He didn’t even get a few seconds to recuperate before he was grabbing for Spike, keeping him from crashing to the floor. His head lolled back on his neck, face dark-red and his breathing laboured. Cursing Liam loosened the tie and lowered Spike down to the floor. Too far, he’d gone too far.

“Will, come on. Shit. Will, wake up.”

Spike’s eyes blinked slowly open and he gazed blurrily up at Liam before smiling tiredly. “Bloody hell, that was incredible!”

“Jesus! You scared the crap out of me.” Liam sat back and ran his fingers through his hair. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

Spike sat slowly up, one hand coming up to stroke his abused neck. He coughed and grimaced and Liam winced in sympathy and guilt.

Spike caught his hand and kissed his fingers. “Hey, don’t. I mean it. You have no idea how bloody erotic it is.” He shuffled over to lean his back against the fridge, stretching his legs out in front of him. “Your head starts pounding and the blood is rushing in your ears and then everything starts to feel so light, like you’re floating. And if you come in that moment it’s like…” He smiled softly. “There’s a reason why the French call an orgasm ‘la petite mort,’ luv.”

“Well, I’m not risking it becoming ‘la _grande_ mort,’ Spike,” Liam said, his voice shaking. “Seriously, I could have killed you.”

Spike shrugged and grinned. “But what a way to go, eh?”

“It’s not funny.” Liam swallowed and stood up slowly. His legs felt weak and he gripped the table for support. “I get that you like it. Hell, it turns me on like nothing else doing it to you, but we’ve got to have some rules. Got to make sure it doesn’t go to far.”

Spike studied him for a moment and then nodded. “Yeah, ok. Fair enough.”

He reached up and Liam grabbed his hand, pulling him to his feet. They stood holding on to each other for a while, both rather unsteady. Spike’s jeans were still around his knees, the shirt rumpled and stained with come. Liam’s pants were kicked to the side along with his shoes and he couldn’t even remember doing it.

“I just realised something,” Spike suddenly said against Liam’s chest.

“What?”

“We didn’t use a condom and now my arse is all squishy.” Spike shifted and grimaced. “And I’ve got come and God knows what else running down my thighs. Eurgh. Think I need to take a shower.”

Liam froze. “I didn’t even think…” He pulled away and stared at Spike. “Fuck. If you want me to get tested, I will. I mean, I haven’t been with anyone else for over six months and I did get tested right after that because I always do every year but…”

“Liam, relax. That’s not what I meant. I’m not worried about that.”

“Well, you _should_ be worried about it. Hell, _I_ should. Have _you_ been tested recently?” Liam groaned. “I can’t believe we never talked about this.”

With a scowl Spike pushed away from him. “You really think I’d get into a relationship with someone without making sure I’m clean? You think I don’t know this can happen when you’re too far gone to stop and there’s no rubber at hand? I’m not stupid, you know. Got tested as soon as we got here.”

“But you didn’t know if I was clean,” Liam argued.

“’Course I did.” Spike smirked. “You write everything down in your journal, including doctor’s appointments.”

“You read my journal?” Liam could feel himself growing more and more irritated.

Spike shrugged. “Well, yeah.” Then seemed to notice Liam’s annoyance and backed slowly away, hitching up his pants. “You left it on the bedside table and I was bored. I only wanted to see what you’d written about me.”

“It was private, Spike. I trusted you to leave it alone.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “I’m sorry, ok? Didn’t think it was a big deal. Maybe you _shouldn’t_ trust me,” he added sullenly when Liam only glared at him.

“Maybe I won’t from now on,” Liam shot back.

They stood glaring at each other, so caught up in their fight that when the phone suddenly rang they both jumped. Liam grabbed the phone and angrily pushed the button, growling a “Yes?”

_“Erm…”_ The voice on the other side sounded hesitant. _“I’m looking for William Giles and was told I could find him in this number.”_

“There’s no…” Liam started then stopped and straightened up, fixing his eyes on Spike. “William… Giles?”

Spike froze, the red marks on his throat standing out even more as his face paled. “Who is it?” he whispered.

“Who is this?” Liam asked into the phone, moving closer to put a hand on Spike’s shoulder.

_“I’m his father, Rupert. Are you Liam Willard?”_

“Yes. You’re his _father_?” Spike turned away, wrenching free from Liam’s grip, and stormed into the living room, leaving Liam to stare dazedly after him. “You’re _Spike’s_ father?”

_“Ah. I’ve obviously found the right address.”_ The man sounded relieved. _“Please tell me, is he there? Can I talk to him?”_

“Hang on a minute. How did you get this phone number?”

The man sighed in frustration. _“Mr. Willard, are you aware that William has been reported missing for over two years?”_ The voice on the other end broke slightly but quickly recovered. _“I could have you arrested for kidnapping and I most certainly will if you don’t let me speak to my son.”_

“Mr. Giles, calm down.” Liam lowered his voice, trying to keep it steady. “I realise that you’re upset but there’s no reason to take that approach. First off, I only met your son three weeks ago so I can hardly be held responsible for him going missing. Second, even if I’ve been urging him to call you ever since he told me of how he left England without a word, as he’s over eighteen it’s entirely up to him if he chooses to speak to you or not.”

_“Over eighteen?”_ The voice on the other end went silent for a moment and when it came back it shook slightly. _“Mr. Willard, my son won’t turn eighteen for another six months. Will you now please put him on?”_

Liam stood still, his fingers cramping around the phone. “Hold on,” he finally said and walked slowly into the living room. Spike was standing by the window, staring down at the lit street below. He didn’t look up when Liam handed him the phone, just took it and turned away, walking down the hall and disappearing into the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Liam sank down on the couch, staring blankly at the black television screen. After a moment he looked down and flinched when he realised he was still naked from the waist down. He stumbled to his feet and went into the kitchen, retrieving his pants and underwear from the floor and put them on with shaky hands. Then he opened the fridge and pulled out a beer, twisting it open and gulping down half of its content before sliding to the floor in defeat.

Christ, what the hell had he got himself into? He was living with an underage kid, having sex with an underage kid. Kinky, dirty perverted sex. Hell, he’d almost strangled him just a few minutes ago. His fingers were still sticky with Spike’s come, his cock smeared with olive oil from when he fucked him hard in the ass. A kid. A seventeen year old kid.

His head felt light and he let it drop back against the wall and closed his eyes.

He didn’t know what to do or think or feel. Spike was still Spike. Still the annoying brat that called him a wanker and a twit, still the one who laughed at Liam’s jokes and smirked when Liam didn’t get his, still the one who curled up to him at night and kissed him in the middle of the shopping street. Still the young man Liam fell in love with. He was just two years younger. Did it matter? Aside from the legal aspect, did it really matter to him?

He didn’t know.

If he’d known from the beginning, would he have started this relationship? Hadn’t that been exactly why he didn’t make a move at first because he thought Spike was too young? And now it turned out that he was. Christ, Spike was nine years younger than him. Nine years. Which meant that when Liam was himself seventeen, Spike was an eight year old boy with scrapes on his knees and baby-fat cheeks. The thought made his stomach turn. He felt old and dirty and so fucking perverted. He could easily be stamped a paedophile.

A soft cough made him open his eyes to find Spike leaning against the kitchen counter, watching him. His eyes were rimmed red, with wet eyelashes, and his face was pale apart from two dark pink spots on his cheeks and a rather red nose.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said. His voice was still hoarse from before and Liam felt slightly sick. “I should have told you.”

“Yeah, you should have.” Liam swallowed. “Christ, Will, what were you thinking?”

Spike looked away, his lower lip trembling. “That you’d make me go back or… or that you wouldn’t want me anymore.”

His shoulders tensed and he seemed to curl in on himself as if he was expecting Liam to tell him just that. Liam opened his mouth to reassure him that nothing had changed but frankly, he didn’t know himself if it had or not so he closed it again. His head was starting to hurt.

“You realise I could get charged with statutory rape?”

Spike’s head jerked up and he stared at Liam in shock. “What?”

Liam sighed. “You’re underage, Spike. Your father could easily have me arrested for having sex with a minor.”

“I’m not…! It’s sixteen in England!”

“Doesn’t matter, it’s eighteen here.” Liam rubbed a hand over his face. “Look, I’m not blaming you. I get it, I really do. And for what it’s worth you seem old enough to me to be able to make that decision. But legally we’re screwed and your father pretty much has me by the balls.”

“But you… you still want me? Right?” Spike’s voice was hardly above a whisper and when Liam looked up he saw his eyes were wide with fear. Liam took a deep breath and then he reached out for Spike, pulling him down to kneel beside him.

“Yeah. Christ, I know it’s wrong but I meant what I said. I love you.” He kissed Spike softly on the lips and then pulled him closer, hugging him tight. “Fuck, I love you so much. How am I supposed to be without you?”

“I love you too,” Spike hiccupped in his ear. “I’m so sorry, Liam. I’m sorry I lied. I didn’t know we would… I never expected this to happen.”

“I know. I know. It’s okay.”

They sat there for a long time, Liam stroking Spike’s hair slowly as he shook in his arms. Somehow he had to work this out.

“What did your dad say?” Liam finally asked softly. “What does he want you to do?”

“He wants me to come home but I said I no. I told him about you and that… that I love you. I told him I’m not leaving you.”

“And what did he say?”

“Well, he was a bit surprised by that, seeing as he didn’t know I was gay,” Spike snorted and Liam couldn’t help chuckling. Spike gave him a hesitant smile but then his face fell and he looked away. “He wanted to know if you were… if I was… You know.”

Liam furrowed his brow in puzzlement. “What?”

“You know.” Spike was red in the face and suddenly seemed to find the tiles on the floor incredibly fascinating. “If I was your... You know.”

The more often Spike said ‘you know’ the more stupid Liam felt. “Huh?”

Spike groaned in frustration. “He thought maybe you’d found me on the streets and bought me, ok?” He rolled his eyes. “Christ, even my own father! What the hell is it about me that screams ‘I’m a boy-whore, ask me how’?”

Liam stared at him in shock. “He said _what?_ That I… _what?_ Where the hell did he get that from?”

“Seems a friend of his saw a picture of you in some newspaper’s art section, taken while you were putting together your exhibition. And recognised me standing in the background. The caption read “Liam Willard and his young protégé.”

Liam frowned. “Protégé? Why the hell protégé?”

“Beats me. Anyway he knew I’d never raised a paintbrush in my life so when I told him we were together he cleverly drew the conclusion that I was in fact your little bum-boy and that he had to save me from your evil perverted clutches.” Spike grimaced. “I don’t think he likes you very much.”

“O-oka-ay.” Liam blinked. “He was quite calm when talking to me.”

“Well, that’s my dad for you. He’d offer you tea and crackers and then, while your happily swallowing it down, he’d calmly tell you he’d actually just given you rat poison and would you like some more tea before you die a horrible painful death?”

“Funny. Er… You are joking, right?”

“Am I?” Spike quirked his eyebrow. “He used to be MI5, you know, but had to retire when his vision failed. He once told me he knew fifteen different ways to kill a man and make it look like a suicide.”

“Not… rat poison?” Liam gulped.

“Know how many people stupidly store rat poison right by their cereal?” Spike shrugged. “Accidents happen.”

“Ok, stop it. Your dad is not going to kill me with rat poison. Besides he’s in England so unless he mails the damn tea....”

Spike squirmed. “Yeah, that’s the other thing. He’s on his way over here.”

Liam jumped up, staring down at him. “What?! Now?!”

“Er… tomorrow?” Spike said sheepishly. “He’ll be at the airport around noon.”

“Jesus!” Liam let himself fall down in a kitchen chair, his head in his hands. “God, we’re so screwed.”

Spike stood up slowly and walked over to him, resting his chin on the top of Liam’s head, his arms wrapped around Liam’s neck. “Hey. It’s gonna be alright. He’ll meet you and see how much you love me and everything will be fine.”

“Spike,” Liam sighed. “Have you looked at yourself in the mirror?”

“What?” Spike glanced at the window, trying to catch his reflection.

“What? You’ve got bruises covering your whole throat. Unless you plan to wear a turtleneck there’s no way he won’t see it and he’ll have my ass thrown in jail just like that.” Liam snapped his fingers.

“Oh. Bugger. We’re screwed.”

Liam nodded glumly. “Yep.”

“Maybe we can run away…”

“No.”

“Or I can tell him I got mugged and left tied up by my neck.”

Liam snorted. “He’ll believe that, right.”

“Or hey! That I got so depressed because people kept calling me a whore that I tried to hang myself.” Spike turned Liam around and slid down to sit on his lap. “And then you saved me in the nick of time, my knight in shining armour.”

Liam couldn’t help smiling, despite everything. “I thought we were trying to show that you’re happy with me, not suicidal.”

“Well, we could always just tell him that we like kinky sex.” Spike smirked and raised his eyebrow. “We could show him the video tapes.”

“God, you’re not even joking, are you?” Liam groaned. “Could this day really get any worse?”

“It’s not all been bad,” Spike argued with a pout. “There was your opening party.”

“Where you punched my sponsor slash ex-boyfriend,” Liam pointed out.

“Was that who he was?” Spike frowned. “I thought he was just one of your groupies that didn’t take no for an answer. Whatever.” He waved it impatiently away. “Then there was fabulous sex.”

“Where I almost strangled you to death and forgot to use a condom and…”

Spike shut him up with a quick kiss. “And last but not least, you told me you loved me. And then I said I loved you too.”

“Well…” Liam couldn’t really find anything to counterpoint that. “Yeah, ok. That was pretty nice.”

“See? When you look at it like that it’s the best day ever.” Spike kissed him again and then stood up. “I’m gonna take a shower. Want to join me?”

“We need to form a strategy. Figure out what to say and do when your dad gets here. And for all I know my sponsorship is gone and Cordy will shut down the exhibition and we’ll lose the apartment and…”

“Liam! I _said_ : ‘I’m gonna take a shower. Want to join me?’” When Liam opened his mouth to argue Spike shushed him with a finger. “Me. Naked. In the shower. Do I really have to spell it out for you?”

Oh. “Oh.” Liam smiled. “No, I think I’ve got it.”

Panicking would have to wait.

 


	4. Chapter 4

“Did you check the bulletin board? Maybe there was another flight? Maybe…”

Liam sighed. He was never giving Spike an espresso again. Or let him eat two donuts in a row. “Relax. It’s only been forty minutes. It takes time to get through customs, especially these days.”

“Oh God. Maybe they arrested him! He’s got a pin in his leg, you know? It probably set off the bloody alarms! Oh Christ!”

“Spike, please, calm down.”

The fact that the airport didn’t allow smoking meant that Spike had nothing to help ease his nerves and he was getting more and more restless. His normal fidgeting behaviour had ten-folded and his hands were twitching for something to do. Liam had stopped him from gnawing his cuticles when the nails had already been butchered to almost non-existence but now he was tightening his hands into fists making Liam relieved there really were no nails left because surely they would have dug holes into his palms by now.

“What if they won’t let him into the country? They think everyone’s a terrorist these days. Because my dad… He can look terrifying when he’s mad. Like if he was thinking of how much he wants to kick my bloody arse for running off and his face got all grr and they thought he was gonna bomb something. Honestly, he gets this look in his eye…”

“Spike!”

“This one time he caught me and my mate Jack behind the house and we had these matches and, I thought he was gonna kill me. Seriously, his face got all red and-mmm.”

There really was only one way to shut him up and Liam thought it was worth being possibly thrown out of the airport for indecent behaviour. It worked double ways because Spike’s ramblings had been pulling Liam closer and closer to the edge himself and if there was one sure way to erase whatever had been bothering you from your mind it was having Spike’s tongue down your throat. Or your tongue down _his_ throat. Or possibly your tongue and teeth _on_ his throat but that would have to wait until later when they weren’t standing in the middle of the JFK airport with Spike’s dad on his wa-

“Ehem.”

Liam opened his eyes to find a handsome man in his fifties standing two feet away, watching them through wire-rimmed glasses. Even if Liam had never seen a picture of Spike’s father he would have recognised those cool blue eyes anywhere. Spike was right, his dad was a scary man when he was angry.

“Think you can let go of my son long enough to allow him to greet his father properly?”

The voice was calm but cold and Spike, who until then had seemed oblivious to his father’s arrival, stiffened in Liam’s arms and then pulled away so quickly Liam almost fell over. “Dad!”

“William.”

For the longest time Liam thought that either Spike’s father would start yelling or Spike himself would bolt. The tension in the air was so palpable he could almost smell it, with father and son staring at each other, more like enemies at the final stand than long lost relatives. When Mr. Giles finally moved, Liam instinctively stepped closer to Spike, but backed away when the fight he’d been expecting did not happen but instead Spike was pulled into his father’s arms and held tight.

“You stupid, stupid boy. Do you know how scared I’ve been for you? Could you not imagine?” His voice trembled and he clutched his son even harder to his chest. “God help me, I should slap you, you arrogant child.”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, dad.” Spike shook, his voice so small he sounded nowhere near his seventeen years. “I was just so angry.”

“I know. I know.” Mr. Giles closed his eyes. “God, I never meant for this to happen. Please forgive me.”

Liam stood back and allowed them their moment of privacy. He couldn’t imagine what it’d been like for Spike’s father to have been separated from his son for three years, and not having any clue of his whereabouts or if he was even alive, for the last two. He expected that there would be a fallout later, with blame and guilt being thrown both ways, but for now it was enough for them to know that they still had each other, whatever that entailed.

Finally Spike’s father pushed him gently away and stood back to look at him. “Well, you’ve certainly grown up.” His eyes glittered. “You look more like your mother than ever.”

Spike hitched his breath, teeth digging into his upper lip. “Yeah? Really?” he asked, almost hopefully.

“Really.” Mr. Giles tilted his head in a way that would have had Liam grinning at the similarity to Spike under any other circumstances. “Well, not the hair. What on earth have you done to it? Dipped it in bleach?” He shook his head as Spike ran his fingers through his hair with a frown. “And the clothes…”

Spike stiffened. “What’s wrong with my clothes?”

Here we go, Liam thought. “Mr. Giles,” he interjected quickly and offered the man his most earnest smile. “You must be tired after your long flight. Maybe we should postpone this until we get somewhere more private?”

The man glared at Liam with a look of disdain. “Mr. Willard, I presume? Seeing as you had my son’s face attached to yours only a moment ago.”

“Dad!” Spike hissed and stepped closer to Liam, slipping one arm around his waist. “You’re being rude!”

“It’s alright.” Liam put a hand on Spike’s shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. “Yes, I’m Liam Willard. It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.” He stuck out his hand.

“I’ll reserve the right to say ‘likewise’ until later, if you don’t mind.” Mr. Giles ignored the hand but grabbed his suitcase and straightened up. “Shall we?” He started toward the exit.

Liam and Spike looked at each other with a matching ‘eek’ expression and then hurried after him.

The silence in the car on the way to their apartment was cold enough to make Liam shiver despite the stifling heat as the sun bore mercilessly down on them. He glanced in the rear-view mirror at Spike who sat subdued, staring down into his lap. As uncomfortable as Liam was feeling he was sure Spike was ten times worse. Despite his brave face the night before he’d been worried sick about his father’s reaction to both him and his relationship with Liam and had spent hours tossing and turning in their bed. This morning Liam had listened to him throw up in the bathroom and when he emerged he was looking slightly green around the edges with a sheen of sweat covering his face.

He wasn’t looking much better now and by the twitching of his hands he was aching for a cigarette. Liam doubted the man sitting stiff and silent in the passenger seat beside him would take kindly to his son rolling down the window and lighting up. It was probably enough of a shock to find that your fourteen year old somewhat wayward child had turned into a seventeen year old leather-wearing, bleach-haired gay punk, without adding smoking to the mix. Probably best to hide the beer as well. He just prayed that there wasn’t a tube of KY or a condom wrapper left on display anywhere in the apartment. These things had a tendency to be left behind in the strangest of places.

“Here we are,” he said unnaturally cheerily as they drove up to the apartment building. They got out of the car and Liam at once reached for Mr. Giles suitcase but was warned off with a glare. Keeping his smile as natural as he could manage he unlocked the door and let them inside the building. After pushing the elevator button about fifteen times it became obvious that it was once again broken and he gave Spike’s father an apologetic smile before leading the way to the staircase. As he ascended the stairs he was painfully aware of Mr. Giles’ eyes drilling into his back and suspected Spike’s gaze of fondling his ass.

This was going to be a long day.

\---------------

They hadn’t really had much time to prepare but it was obvious that Spike’s father couldn’t stay with them. For one thing there was only one bed and, more importantly, even if they’d manage to borrow a mattress somewhere, Liam knew there was no way he could sleep in the same bed as Spike with his father in the next room. The man might know they slept together but there was no reason to rub his nose in it. And, frankly, it was impossible to be in the same bed as Spike and not have something happen. Like loud blowjobs.

Only one look around the place was enough to make Mr. Giles aware of the problem and he turned to Liam with an air of resignation.

“I didn’t have time to make reservations anywhere. Maybe you would be kind enough to make some calls, see what you can find? Nothing too fancy. As long as it has a bed and a shower I’m satisfied.”

It was as plain a dismissal as anything and Liam accepted it with a nod, retiring to the bedroom to make the calls while father and son faced each other in the living room. Liam could hear the murmur of their voices down the hall and through the door but he only caught a word or two when either one of them got agitated and forgot to keep it down. He felt guilty for leaving Spike to face the fire alone but at the same time he knew this was something they had to work out on their own. If things came to blow or if he’d detect any sign of Spike not being able to handle it he’d step up. But until then…

Liam closed his eyes and let himself fall back on the pillows. He couldn’t really see how any of this could turn out well. Apart from the whole mess with Spike being underage and probably illegally in the country after all this time, there was the exhibition and it’s no doubt scandalous reviews, not to mention how he was probably facing eviction after Spike knocked out Lindsey.

Liam couldn’t help smiling despite everything. It really had been priceless, the look on Lindsey’s face when he realised he’d been knocked down by a teenager, and Liam’s lover at that. Liam had no doubt that in a regular fight Lindsey would win. He was both older and physically stronger and had proved himself to be quite ruthless when going after what he wanted. But Spike had taken Lindsey completely by surprise, knocking him out from the left field while his eyes and mind were focused on Liam. He only hoped Lindsey wouldn’t try and take his revenge out on Spike. God knows he had the law on his side if he wanted to go that way.

Liam opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling then turned his head and let his eyes roam over the spacious room. Despite their efforts to tidy up and not let it look like a kinky love nest, the bedroom, as well as the rest of the apartment, bore witness of what they’d been building up the last three weeks. It looked homey, a place where two people lived and loved, and he would be sad to leave. Even if they’d only planned to be here for the summer it felt like their home, not surprising since it was the only place they’d lived in together. He knew Cordy wanted him to stay in New York for as long as the exhibition ran but if it came to it, they’d move home to LA. Of course he didn’t even know if Cordy still wanted his art after what had happened. For all he knew Lindsey had withdrawn his money and that probably left her with no choice but to blow the whole thing off. Even if the critiques had liked his work, the incident last night was sure to have put a negative stamp on the event.

Now that he thought about it he was surprised he hadn’t heard from Cordy at all. He was sure she would be all over him about what had happened, and he suspected reviews might be up at least at the online art sites which he knew she trolled like Spike trolled for porn. He checked his cell but there were no missed calls. He should be worried but for now he was just going to enjoy the silence.

Talking about which… He strained his ears but the voices outside had gone quiet and after waiting a long while for some kind of sign that they were still out there and hearing absolutely nothing, Liam got up off the bed and opened the door. He walked hesitantly along the corridor and checked the kitchen before popping his head into the livingroom.

Spike’s father was standing by the window, back turned. He was staring down at the street below, seeming deep in thought. There was no sign of Spike. Liam stepped back, already planning where to go look for the boy, when Mr. Giles spoke.

“He says he loves you, Mr. Willard. I suppose he believes he does. At seventeen even the silliest crushes seem like the real thing.” He laughed coldly. “If Romeo and Juliet had been in their thirties the story would have ended quite differently, I suspect.”

“Mr. Giles, first of all, please call me Liam.” Liam held the man’s gaze as he turned to him, keeping his voice calm but firm. “Mr. Willard was my father and I have no desire to be him. Second, William might be young but he’s hardly a child. He’s been taking care of himself for two years, travelling across America. That kind of experience, I would say, makes a boy grow up pretty fast.”

Mr. Giles held his stare and then nodded. “Liam. All right. I guess you have a point there. It still doesn’t change the fact that he’s only seventeen years old and _you_ are?”

“Twenty six, sir.” Liam swallowed the guilt he’d been feeling ever since he found out how great their age gap really was. “Which I realise is a lot older than what you would like for your son but…”

“What _I_ would like for my son is for him to be living at home in England with me, dating a sweet young girl of respectable parentage.” Mr. Giles pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and then took off his glasses and started to polish them. “Now clearly that is not going to happen. What I would be willing to _settle_ for is a whole different matter.”

He put on his glasses again and gave Liam a pointed look. “I think this requires tea. You do have tea, don’t you, or has William been completely colonized to coffee?”

Thank God for Spike’s morning after hang over remedies. “Tea. Of course. Kitchen?”

Liam threw Mr. Giles some inconspicuous glances while he put the kettle on and tottered around the kitchen, putting out biscuits and jam and sugar and everything else he could think of. Despite the man’s coldness he wasn’t really hostile and Liam didn’t think it was just because of the cool British approach. In fact, more than anything Mr. Giles looked tired, completely worn out to tell the truth. There were bags under his eyes and lines around his mouth that spoke of tension and worry that had been festering for far too long. Liam felt deeply sorry for him. It must have been hell what Spike had put him through, disappearing like that. Especially as he was probably still mourning for his wife.

He poured them both tea and then sat down on the opposite side of the small table, waiting for Spike’s father to start speaking. He wasn’t sure what to expect but he wasn’t letting Spike go without a fight, that much he knew. He sipped the tea, added another lump of sugar, and was reaching for a biscuit when Mr. Giles cleared his throat.

“I read up on you, what little there was to find. You turned your back on your father and his business - well, law in general – to pursue a life as an artist. I’d like to know why.”

Liam frowned. “Why I became an artist?”

“Why you thought it necessary to go about it that way. From what I understood you had quite the promising career in your field. And yet you decided your art was worth not only throwing that away but cutting all ties with your family as well. Strikes me as odd I must say.”

Liam nodded thoughtfully. “I suppose it does.” He cracked the biscuit in two and then laid both parts down on the table in front of him before looking up, fixing his eyes on Mr. Giles. “I didn’t really cut the ties with my father as much as he cut his ties with me. He had a few problems with my… ‘lifestyle’, once he found out. To put it bluntly, sir, he’d rather have seen me dead than gay.”

Mr. Giles didn’t flinch but his eyes flickered for a moment and he reached for a biscuit of his own, dipping it in the tea before biting into it. He chewed and then swallowed carefully before looking up again. “If you’re worried that I’m going to disown my son for being homosexual then you can rest easy. It’s not what I would have chosen for him but it doesn’t change anything. He’s my son and I love him no matter what.”

“I’m glad you feel that way, Mr. Giles,” Liam said and tempted a small smile. “I hope you told him that, I know he was worried.”

“I don’t know how well he listened but I said as much, yes.” Spike’s father sighed. “Your gender is not what worries me. I would have been just as worried if you were a woman, almost ten years his senior. There is a scale of balance here, Liam, and it’s not tipping in his favour.”

“I wouldn’t…” Liam bit his lip. “It’s not like that.”

Mr. Giles shook his head. “He is young and he is easily influenced. He has a very low income of his own, not enough to support himself. He is living in _your_ flat, eating food _you_ pay for, wearing clothes _you_ bought for him. You have a sexual relationship where _you_ are the one both emotionally and physically stronger. It has all the elements of a kept relationship, with _him_ as the dependant. Am I not right?”

“I guess, if you look at it that way but…”

“Well then, if you please, show me another way to look at it. A way that convinces me that you are _not_ taking advantage of a young boy, alone and far away from home.” Mr. Giles looked up, fixing his eyes on Liam’s. “Because I saw the bruises, Liam, and they do not speak of a relationship built on equality.”

Liam could feel his face turning deep red. He wished he knew what Spike had told his father, if he had spun up some stupid story to explain the marks he’d obviously been unsuccessful at hiding under his collar, or if he’d told the truth. Well, no matter which way he’d gone, Liam only had one option.

“I know it may seem strange to you, because he’s so much younger than me and because we are different in so many ways, but I actually do love your son. I know we’ve only known each other a little over three weeks but that’s still the way it is. I suppose, if I _was_ abusing him, that I would still say that but it’s the truth.” He looked down, stirring his tea as he tried to find the right words.

“I put the bruises there, yes. It wasn’t intentional, by which I mean that they weren’t supposed to be that visible. We… We have our kinks, sir, our preferences, as people do, and we like to indulge in them.” He looked up to find Spike’s father watching him angrily. “I know how it sounds and believe me, I never thought I’d have to explain the sexual part of a relationship to my partner’s parent but you asked and I guess you have a right to know. To some extent at least.”

Mr. Giles nodded, his eyes stone hard. “These kinks… what do they involve? Are we talking Sado-Masochism or…?”

“God, no. Nothing like that.” Liam swallowed. “Light bondage, biting… breathplay. Which is what those marks came from. There was the grand opening of my exhibition last night and Spike was wearing a tie and…” He stopped. Could this really get any more embarrassing?

“You strangled him.” It was not as accusatory as he would have expected.

“I…” Liam faltered. “Yes.”

The eyes staring at him seemed to flicker. “He… likes this?”

Liam couldn’t help the small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “To put it mildly, yes.”

“Hmm.” Mr. Giles sipped his tea, a deep frown between his eyebrows. “He had a cat when he was little. It used to sleep on his throat. I kept shoving it away, afraid it would choke him, but he said he liked it. That it calmed him down. Maybe…” He shrugged. “Who knows?”

“Mr. Giles…”

Spike’s father waved his hand. “Just Giles. Please.”

“Giles, sir, I promise you I would never do anything to hurt your son. These games… they’re a part of what we have but they’re not what it’s built on.”

“But how can you be sure?” Giles raised his eyebrows at him. “Where lies the line that separates play from abuse and would you know if you’d crossed it?”

“I trust your son to tell me if things go to far. He’s anything but subdued, sir. In fact I find myself on the receiving end more than often.” Liam suddenly realised what he’d said and flushed red. “I mean, in terms of who dominates whom, emotionally. He bosses me around just as much as I do him. Even more.”

Giles pursed his lips and shook his head. “If he loves you as much as he says he does, he might _not_ tell you, in case it means that he could lose you.”  
  
Liam wanted to growl in frustration. “Look, even if I didn’t know _how_ young he was I’ve always been very aware of the fact that he _is_ young. Which is why I made all that clear to him from the beginning, and have made him reassure me again and again, that this is what he wants. There is no coercion here, believe me. We have talked about all of this, everything you just mentioned, and this is what we both want. I love him and he loves me and that doesn’t have anything to do with what we do in bed.”

Giles clenched his jaw. “I don’t like it.”

“You don’t have to like it, sir. Frankly, I doubt any parent likes to think of their child having a sexual relationship of any kind. A gay kinky one with an older man? Probably not high on the wish-list. But it isn’t about what you like or what you want. It’s about what Spike wants. And I believe he wants me.”

They held each other’s stare for a long time and then finally Giles nodded. “Alright. There’s still the issue of your legal status.”

Liam froze.

“I don’t mean that I’m going to report you. From what I’ve read up on, even if I did want to, there’s actually nothing I _can_ do, not as long as you live here. The legal age of consent in the state of New York is seventeen, which sets it apart from many other states in America. Including the one I believe you otherwise reside in, California.”

Liam blinked. He hadn’t thought of that. He could feel a small part of the huge load on his shoulders lift.

“However, William is still here, in the United States, illegally. Without a special visa he’s only allowed to stay for three months but he’s been here for over two years. If he’s caught, for any reason, he will be deported immediately. Frankly, knowing my son, I’m surprised he hasn’t been already. He doesn’t exactly fly under the radar, so to speak.”

Liam allowed himself a small smile, even if his stomach was clenched in worry. He’d known, of course he had, but he’d been able to ignore it until now. But Spike’s father was right. All it took was Spike drawing some bad attention to himself, like for example by punching a wealthy lawyer in the face, and he could be deported.

“Could he apply for a student visa?”

“Is he studying anything? Besides the art of the Marquis de Sade,” Giles asked sarcastically.

Liam blushed. “Well, no. But I know he wants to. He didn’t even finish high school,” he pointed out.

Giles stiffened but then his shoulders slumped in defeat. “He had a year left until his A-levels when he disappeared. He was an excellent student too, before… before his mother died. I guess he told you about what happened?”

Liam nodded. “He hasn’t touched them since. Drugs, I mean.”

“I handled it badly. I just…” Giles shook his head. “I wasn’t there for him and then I drove him away.” He shuddered suddenly as if overcome with emotion even if his face revealed very little. “He’s changed so much. It’s almost like looking at a stranger. And I’m afraid that he will never let me close again.”

“I’m sure…”

“I was called to the morgue twice last year,” Giles continued, ignoring him. “Each time they lifted the sheet my heart stopped in my chest. And when I saw it wasn’t him…I… I…” He drew in a shaky breath. “I never thought I’d be so glad to see the face of a stranger. A young man, someone else’s son, lay dead before me and I wanted to laugh with joy. Doesn’t that just sicken you?”

Liam swallowed. “I’m so sorry. It must have been horrible for you.”

The man didn’t seem to hear him. “And he doesn’t understand. He thinks I’m being overbearing, that I am meddling with things that don’t concern me. He doesn’t know what it’s like to be the one left behind, waiting by the phone for the news of your child, to know whether he’s alive or lying dead somewhere. Alone and cold and _dead_.” Giles took off his glasses with a shaky hand, putting them in his breast pocket before covering his eyes with his palm, elbow resting on the table.

Liam didn’t know what to do but when he glanced up he saw he wouldn’t have to do anything. Spike was standing in the doorway, watching his father’s slumped form with a look of horror on his face. As if it had finally dawned on him what he’d done, what he’d made his father go through. Liam got up quietly and walked over to Spike, kissing him gently on the forehead.

“Just talk to him, ok? Everything’s gonna be alright. I love you.”

And then he walked out, leaving the two of them alone. He had a call to make.

\-------------------

“Morning.”

Liam blinked his eyes open, squinting against the early morning sun. “Uhng?”

“I made you toast, luv.” Spike pulled the covers off him in one swift motion. “Come on, stop drooling on your pillow and get up.”

Liam yawned and reluctantly sat up. “There better be some coffee with that toast.”

“Only if you get your arse out of bed right this minute. Or I’ll pour it down the drain.”

“You wouldn’t!”

Spike smirked. “Watch me.”

He didn’t make it further than the door before Liam was up and out of bed, rummaging through the drawers for a clean pair of underwear.

“You are the evilest boyfriend in the whole world, you know that?” he grumbled and pulled on his boxers. “And since when are you a morning person?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be back to my usual grouchy self tomorrow. But today is a special day.” Spike winked at him. “And I’m not just talking about the blowjob I’m going to give you if you hurry up.”

Liam snorted even if his dick perked up considerably. “I’m not sure that being forced to sit through an hour of boring speeches counts as ‘special’,” he teased and then ducked as Spike swatted at his head. “Ok, ok! Cut it out!”

“Watch it or I’ll withdraw that blowjob offer,” Spike growled and threw open the closet. “And just so you know?” he added, throwing Liam an evil smirk. “I’m wearing a tie.”

Liam gulped. “Yeah?”

“Oh yes. Of course, my dad’s gonna be there so…” Spike shrugged.

“I’m sure he won’t mind us disappearing for a few minutes after the ceremony.” Liam slid up behind Spike and pulled him closer, nibbling at his earlobe. “He’s had his eye on that teacher of yours all winter. Now that you’re graduating he has no reason to hold back anymore. Maybe he’ll need a few minutes of his own.”

“Oh, ok. Seriously? Eeww.” Spike shuddered. “My dad is not shagging anyone. He’s never had sex in his life. In fact, I magically appeared one day after he and my mum spent a day _not_ having sex. Alright?”

“You know, you’re adorable when you’re acting all teenage-y.” Liam laughed when Spike made to punch him. “You are! _‘Seriously.’_ Your high school friends are having a bad influence on you. I distinctively heard you say ‘awesome’ yesterday and last week you spent a whole hour watching The O.C.”

“Shut up. It was the season finale, ok?” Spike turned around in his arms and batted his eyes, pitching his voice higher. “I had to know if Ryan and Seth would finally consummate their love.”

Liam chuckled even if he had no idea who these people were. “And did they?”

“Not on screen, no,” Spike pouted. “American television is so bloody pathetic. Can’t wait to catch up with my shows when we go home. I wonder what happened to Todd on Corrie,” he added thoughtfully.

Liam nuzzled into his neck. “If you’re going to spend the whole summer watching television we might as well stay here.”

“Oh quit it. You know you’re looking forward to going to England just as much as I am. Painting the idyllic landscape of Ye Old Country.” Spike snorted. “I’ll be lucky if I get to see you at all.”

“ _My_ old country is actually Ireland. I’ve never been there though,” Liam said wistfully.

“We could go?” Spike suggested as he slipped away from Liam and started skimming through his shirts.

“I guess.” Liam shrugged and found the shirt Spike was looking for, handing it to him. “If you can get away from your shows long enough.”

“Duh, they have tellies in Ireland, you know. They’re not all living in the dark ages even if you are.”

“ _’Duh?’_ ” Liam asked with a smirk.

“Oh, shut up!”

Liam laughed and sat down on the bed under the pretence of putting on his socks when actually he was just watching Spike getting dressed. The boy had grown up the past year, not only mentally but physically as well. He had been far from scrawny when they first met but now his muscles were even more defined and the Californian sun had done his complexion good. It was more in his face though that the difference was evident. His eyes were wiser, his lips expressed more maturity and he held his head with confidence. Liam sometimes got lost in watching Spike just doing every day things that shouldn’t be that intriguing. The way he frowned when he was reading, the small smile he wore when he slept. The way his eyes would light up whenever his father called. The hint of grief twitching his lips whenever he saw women that reminded him of his mother.

Sometimes Liam couldn’t believe they really were here, together. That for some reasons unknown, Fate had decided it was alright for him to have this. It baffled him, in the same way as someone buying one of his paintings or being recognised on the streets by a fan did. He expected to wake up any moment and find himself alone and hungry in a dirty motel room again. That was what his father had sentenced him to and Liam couldn’t help wondering what the bastard would have thought of all this. If given time he’d come to his senses or if his son being a well-known artist with friends in high places meant nothing as long as he was still gay. He suspected so. Not that it mattered.

Things could have turned out quite differently and he shuddered to think what that meant. Lindsey could have had Spike arrested for assault and probably would have if Cordy hadn’t threatened to call his wife and tell her about the quick and, according to her, rather unsatisfying sex they’d had in his hotel room after she patched him up. “If it was so quick and unsatisfying, how come you were still there when I called you?” Liam asked with a grin and was told by a blushing Cordy to mind his own damn business if he wanted her help.

When it came to his exhibition it seemed the fight between “young Liam’s unknown lovers” had only served to make him more interesting in the eyes of the media. He’d sold more than half of his paintings that weekend and from there things only got better. And if anything, living with Spike only improved his work, allowing his imagination to see what he’d never even dreamed off before. Not that he would ever tell Spike that, there was a limit to how cocky Liam could allow him to get.

They’d been able to keep the apartment throughout the summer, thanks again to Cordy’s amazing ‘persuasion skills’ and by the time school started they were back in Los Angeles. Spike was then still four months short of his eighteenth birthday so officially he was an exchange student, living with a distant relative. He’d aced all the tests necessary to allow him to attend the senior year at Belmont High School and had been doing extremely well all year. He hadn’t been eighteen for more than a few hours before he was kissing Liam on the front steps of his school, indifferent of his fellow students whistling and snapping pictures with their cell phones. When he’d finally allowed Liam to pull away, flushed red and sure that someone would stalk up to them and arrest him despite them for once not doing anything illegal, Spike took a bow for their audience, a huge smile on his face. The memory still made Liam smile. And cringe. And harden in his pants.

“You brooding, luv?”

Liam woke up from his musings to find Spike watching him with concern. He shook his head and smiled. “Nah. Just wondering if you’re really gonna need pants under the gown. I mean, as long as it isn’t too windy…” He shrugged and grinned suggestively.

Spike laughed and wiggled his ass at him as he flipped through the rack of ties. “You old pervert. You sure you want to be giving me ideas like that?” He stopped, tilting his head as his eyes got a far-away look. “I can just see the headlines: _‘Liam Willard’s protégé arrested for mooning the audience at his high school graduation.’_ ”

“You know, at one time or another they’re gonna realise you’re not so much my protégé as my constant pain in the ass.”

“I think it’s called ‘boyfriend’ and yes, I think they will.” He walked over until he was standing between Liam’s legs where he sat on the bed. “Probably today when I get off that stage and snog you in front of everyone and their mother.”

Liam smiled. “Yeah?”

Spike grinned and pushed him back on the bed. “Oh yeah. Now what did we decide about that blowjob?”

“That you were gonna give me one?” Liam suggested hopefully.

The blue silk slipped between Spike’s fingers. “With or without the tie?”

Fin


End file.
